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Reason why there are many singles in Sg.

lolabunny said:
and all he cares about is sex from FLs. WLs, his next target from the new imports etc. can you imagine a husband like this when a baby is sick at home?
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you seriously need to work out your relationship with your bf!
 
lolabunny said:
no la. he doesn't deserve shouting at. :) u only yell at someone you care about, not someone you are angry at. know what i mean? ;)

don't need to tell him anything real and sincere. the point of having $ is so that he can be lied to by FL/WL. no one go to pros to be told that bad points.

of course, girls must be gentle and give the guy face, especially in front of his friends.
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Just want to ask , you choose him to be your BF because primarily that he is rich and tons of cash to spare or

u like him a bit only , but with loads of cash, he can be a good catch. So u decide to stick with him.

Just want to help you EDIT your thinking and set your priority right. The people here are real adults. Don want to condem people. Because you have a choice of making thing right for yourself. Don blame your BF any more. He is wrong but you can make it right for you and him.
 
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congo9 said:
Just want to ask , you choose him to be your BF because primarily that he is rich and tons of cash to spare or

u like him a bit only , but with loads of cash, he can be a good catch. So u decide to stick with him.
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That is what i suspect and pls come clean lah. Bros here not stupid one.
 
I'm waiting for a direct counter letter from an SPG "Why i chose an Ang Mor".

"My current husband is so sensitive and loving. He buys me expensive gifts, and I live with him in a big house in USA. Sinkee man can't even speak decent Engrish, and provide the most basic demands of a modern woman. Can you blame me for it??"
 
congo9 said:
Just want to ask , you choose him to be your BF because primarily that he is rich and tons of cash to spare or

u like him a bit only , but with loads of cash, he can be a good catch. So u decide to stick with him.

Just want to help you EDIT your thinking and set your priority right. The people here are real adults. Don want to condem people. Because you have a choice of making thing right for yourself. Don blame your BF any more. He is wrong but you can make it right for you and him.
Click to expand...

I didn't know he was rich at first, i met him when i was very naive. he was very nice to me, he was a really good friend who comforted me when my ex and i had problems. He's a very nice person in some ways, kind to family, hardworking, he's there for his friends.

The thing about him having money is that it doesn't mean that much to me. he knows that. in fact it makes me feel inferior, this part i've not really told him in detail. i feel that i cannot measure up to that level of success and i don't want a hubby who i am much unequal to.

A family friend married a rich guy who conked off at 39 and she had to bring up 5 kids after being a tai-tai for 10 years. She had no skills and the kids had a terrible time coz the business failed without her hubby. I don't want that to happen to me.

Also, given that his background is different, he doesn't understand what it's like to grow up not having money. Sometimes, he really isn't sensitive to such things, not that he has a bad heart.

Say i fell down and he asked me to see a doctor. I was being silly and trying to save money, but seriously, i didn't want to spend $30-50 for bandages, dressing and ointment. I can eat at home for a week on this money. A trip a FL easily is twice of that, but this guy never bothered when I told him I wouldn't see a doctor. At time that, we were on a break, but still, don't you think he's very heartless?

My family beats me sometimes and he just told me to move out but i just cannot imagine spending a few hundred a month on rent. And he didn't bother asking me why that happened. I think he didn't want to be responsible for me. In the end, I was so scared, I lived with my friends on and off. I had to switch off my phone and he got angry at that too. I had no one to turn to.

Not once did he offer to help me, AND i didn't ask anything from him either. I've never ever asked to even borrow money, much less ask for anything.

That's why I didn't pick up that he was rich, I don't judge people like that and I didn't bother to ask questions about his family, background, salary. I didn't think it would affect my opinion of him, and to this day, it doesn't matter to me, unless it helps me understand him more.

Plus I did do something wrong, I said that I despise rich people, before i knew that he was. Guess that really drove a wedge between us. I guess I should say sorry for that.

I am not really into material things that money can buy and i can afford to if i work very hard, but I don't spend my money like that. Even when I didn't see the doctor, it didn't stop me from pushing a $10 note into an old granny's hand or buying her a bowl of noodles when she shouldn't be out in the rain selling tissue.

The most beautiful things in life are not expensive. Things like a call to ask if my leg is ok, if i need to see a doctor for my chest pains because i've been working too hard.

To my credit, i've never ever once asked him for something he cannot give, not more of his time, not more of his love and not a single cent of his money.

If I don't believe in spoiling my kids with expensive toys, what else can I spend his supposed money on? On LV? On Gucci? To show off? I think he knows I'm not like that. My closest friends are all modest people.

I don't think there's another girl in sinkieland like me, but look-wise I am common. Maybe that's why he doesn't cherish me. My looks cannot be compared to FLs at all.

I'm not that great anyway, so it's not like he can't get girls better than me in ways he feels are important to be good at.

If he's reading this right now, I hope he donates some money to the Buddhist Lodge so that old folks can have a better free meals instead of whoring away the dough.

I think he has his own issues and it takes two to make something work.

It's just that... I think it's touching that people have emotions for each other, shared feelings, experiences, memories. Things to cherish, things which are free. Don't know why but i'm crying as I type this... how much does watching a sunset cost anyway? He thinks i'm a romantic while he's a cynic.

At the end of the day, will he take the bus with me? Do you guys know what I mean? I'm the only girl in his life who will take a bus with him when he is ever broke, but does he want a girl like that? I don't think he will take the bus ever.

Think i better go find downgrader. He has at least one guitar more than the sunset. :p Even if we pick up the lottery ticket and win the Toto, at least he won't be cynical and think that I'm after his money. Unless his guitar can be hawked at the pawnshop. :)

Anyhow, you guys can shoot questions at me. It does help me think things through.

Almost forget to thank you guys for your patience. Don't be prejudiced just coz you have abit of dough ok? Not every pretty girl need to worry that a guy cannot see her for her character.
 
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lolabunny said:
Same for a guy right? If your wife rather buy a LV bag then send the kid to extra tuition if he needs it, then what kind of a mom is that?? :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

i think you should start a workshop for women... you can be their guru :D:p:D:p
 
Firstly, I'd like to state that no matter what I say here, because I'd like to be brief as possible, it may come across like I'm complaining about him.

Which I am not, his good points are actually numerous, which I will not go into here to protect his privacy.I am a person who actually looks on the bright side of things, so I'm only examining what caused things to fail here. Thus the probable negative tone or points.

If he didn't have any good points, he would not have gotten my respect in the first place, respect and admiration not bought by money.

With regards to money, let's look at Price Vs Value. I think i'll use examples which guys are familiar with -- finance stuff instead of lovey dovey things.

What is Price? The amount we pay for something.

What is Value? The intrinsic or market worth for something.

This guy has little idea of Value but he values most things based on price. The price of a hooker. The price of whatever he has to pay in his life for the things he buys.

I look at Value.

You know, to poor people, something cheap, low in price can be very valuable. To rich people, an item's value is reflected in its price.

If LV bag was priced at $10, yes, $10, given its quality, how many OL would want it? You can't bribe your Gf with that anymore.

If the Bossini bag was $1000, you bet that there would be people buying, and can even justifying WHY that can be worth $1000.

Can people really be this dumb? This is an extreme example, but we know that it can be true in the real world. How so?

Take property. The reason why in the last two years, sinkie prop is worth a hell lot more is because the en-bloc price psf for old condos shot up. The land cost is worked into the new PRICE psf for the NEW CONDO.

Previously, $1000 psf was a new record for certain areas and suddenly, there are so many places asking for that.

Yet people pay. WHY? Because if they dare price it like that, people will think it's worth it. They think that other people will pay even more when the primary buyers try to sell it on the secondary market.

But gfs are not like WL or FL. They don't charge per hour. They have value but they don't have a price. I don't anyway.

If I give up my part time waitressing job to keep my bf company, does he understand that not only it costs me the "price" of my salary, but also my RENT?

That is my VALUE in the market sense, but what is the value of my sacrifice?

If I don't ask him for that value, I am a good woman, but also someone who cannot pay her rent.

So I don't have enough time for him. When I am busy working, I neglect him or I choose to spend more time on my work and less time on him. So he looks for WL/FL.

I've never once said "Hey I'm struggling to make a living here, please understand and actually be happy i'm not trying to use sex to get you to pay my rent."

To him, he reads it as: busy gf, no time to play with him.

A bf turning into a hubby is a long long way off. If i make the sacrifice for a poorer guy, no one can say I am a golddigger.

But if he's rich, does it mean that I am with him because of his money? Can't he be a nice funny guy?

Tonychat, a good catch is only a good catch when he is a husband or she is a wife. And only if he's a good provider, not just in money but in love. Not when he is a playboy who wouldn't commit. Not when we don't go on expensive dates and we are private people who don't show off to others.

He thinks that other women are worth more because their value, due to their price being more. Highly priced hookers for example. Due to the fact that other men desire them too.

Must I be a whore who charges a lot to demonstrate my value?

Perhaps charge him $1000 an hour to give him the sweetest gfe by cooking for him before giving him a BBBJ? Then listening to him talk about his work problems. Which hooker can do that? What is the price of the sincerity? The price of the LOVE?

When I was a little girl, I only wanted one single toy to play with. In my own way, I wanted to contribute to the family by helping them save money because I don't have what it takes to earn money.

So in that sense, one can say that I was sensitive about money. But that doesn't make me a gold digger. And I have dated guys whom I had to help out financially, and all I can say is, so many people were affected by the Asian Economic Crisis in 1997 and 911 in 2001.

I told myself that I needn't envy richer kids because what I wanted was a toy I truly cherished. My family doted on my younger brother more because he was a boy and much smarter than me.

So I told my mom to buy me just one toy when I was in Pri 1 and I won't want anything else. I stuck to my promise: I had no watch, no handphone, no branded sports shoes, no brand schoolbag, no hip clothes all the way till I could work to make my own money and even then, I dressed shabbily from This Fashion.

Can you imagine what my schoolmates thought of me? Forget Espirit, CK or whatever. Things I can afford now but I won't pay for. I still shop at
This Fashion.

My brother had a roomful of toys, branded watches like Swatch, Casio Baby G, Sony discman, Nike shoes. I had nothing, not even envy. And I had good grades too.

My brother went on to study overseas, because my family only had money for one. As the elder one, I sacrificed that chance to go to a better school. Of course, family re-wrote history to say that I was the dumber one so I didn't go.

Fact is, my dad had a soft spot for me being the loser daughter but knowing my mom who favoured my brother, I let him go instead because I cared for her feelings and because I loved my brother so much, I'd be proud of his success. Which I am.

It was my one shot to have a slightly better future but I gave it up for someone who I loved. This is the kind of person I am. If my ex is better off without me, I'd be happy for him.

My brother went on to be a banker while I went on to be a teacher. After I saved up enough and after my bond, I went to study overseas on my own money.

Today he is laid off thanks to the subprime bust. He doesn't know what else to do besides banking and he hates the world for being "stupid and unfair".

As for me, I had many life skills thanks to the years of part time work. So even though I work in menial jobs, I will never starve.

For my ex bf, he isn't a selfish person by nature. But he is a taker like my brother. He never had to sacrifice in terms of toys or money. And he is capable in his own right.

So he doesn't appreciate my sacrifices for him, if any, because what he can see in the PRICE of my sacrifice, he can't always see the VALUE.

Can my brother see that I didn't just sacrifice the university course fees? I sacrificed my future for him. Who doesn't want an overseas degree? I would have gotten the banking job.

If i went first, I would have more years in the workforce in a bank and gave more money to the family. My bro's salary went to his taxes overseas, his rent, his branded stuff.

He plays tennis in a country club with his friends, goes skiing in winter and sailing in the summer.

Me? I cook. Coz it's cheaper to eat at home and coz when I do have to, I can give the tissue Ah Ma $10 instead of just some coins.

So yes, I like this guy who likes to go pros because of his money. Next time I get rich, I really don't know what to spend my money on.

If i knew, I think i would have bluffed my ex for some diamond or gold and I would have pawned these immediately and give the money to charities during this economic downturn because
as we know, when people tighten their belts, they can't afford to donate more to the needy.

Now come to think of it, I know why I am still poor. Because I am stupid like that.

And no, I'm not a goody two shoes. I just know what it is like to suffer and to have been poor.

My ex didn't understand, 人情, because he never had to go out on a limb to help people. Rich people don't give each other loans, they just chuck each other as friends if the other guy lost his fortune thanks to some crisis.

Poor people stand by their friends. Even if our friend "borrows" a few thousand because he lost his job, we just "lend" knowing well that we may not get our money back and

To be fair to him, he wouldn't know what sacrifice means because he has never been poor enough. It's one thing having your parents tell you how tough life is, it's another having to live it yourself.

I think some forumners would know this if they are now parents of children, but they came up the hard way growing up in kampung or a small flat full of people.
 
zhihau said:
i think you should start a workshop for women... you can be their guru :D:p:D:p
Click to expand...

Every woman is different, as if any woman would listen to me. :) They have a choice on how to live their life.

But if I was a mom, I would be like Obama's grandmother:

http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1852589,00.html

Then this summer, Obama talked about his grandmother again when he accepted his party's nomination in Denver. "She's the one who taught me about hard work. She's the one who put off buying a new car or a new dress for herself so that I could have a better life. She poured everything she had into me. And although she can no longer travel, I know that she's watching tonight, and that tonight is her night as well."
 
eeoror88 said:
China mei meis better fucks ??
Click to expand...

This man does not represent the Singaporean male populace.

He and others like him do not represent me.

Not all Singaporean guys treat women like blow up dolls. Not all Singaporean men objectify women and don't size themselves up first.

So please don't bash "Singaporean guys". There're just a few bad eggs.
 
how touching... lola my dear... will u consider marrying dis auntie? :rolleyes:
 
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