What does the Bible say about sex?

[Patriot]

Is it wrong for a couple to live together before marriage?​

ANSWER

The answer to this question depends somewhat on what is meant by “living together.” If “living together” simply means sharing the same house or apartment, with no sexual connotation, then, no, it is not technically wrong. Strictly speaking, there is nothing sinful about an unmarried man and an unmarried woman living in the same house or apartment, as long as there is no sex taking place.

However, that is not what is commonly meant by the term living together, which is often used as a euphemism for “having sex before marriage,” synonymous with shacking up. The Oxford Dictionary defines live together as “share a home and have a sexual relationship.” Rightly or wrongly, the sex is assumed.

For the purposes of this article, we will define living together or cohabiting as “sharing a home and having a sexual relationship.” Using that definition of living together, it is definitely wrong. Premarital sex is condemned in Scripture, along with all other forms of sexual immorality (Acts 15:20; Romans 1:29; 1 Corinthians 5:1; 6:13, 18; 7:2; 10:8; 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3–5; Jude 1:7). The Bible promotes complete abstinence outside of (and before) marriage. Sex before marriage is just as wrong as adultery and other forms of sexual immorality because they all involve having sex with someone to whom you are not married.

We live in a world that is increasingly supportive of couples living together before marriage. According to a 2016 Barna study, the most common justification for living together is to evaluate compatibility (84 percent); other reasons include saving on rent (5 percent) and other practical considerations (9 percent) (www.barna.com/research/majority-of-americans-now-believe-in-cohabitation, accessed 9/15/21). This acceptance of living together is found even among practicing Christians, of whom 41 percent say cohabitation is “a good idea” (ibid.). In 2019, Pew Research found that 58 percent of white evangelicals approve of cohabitation if the couple plans to marry (cited in www.crosswalk.com/family/marriage/christians-and-cohabitation-what-you-need-to-know.html, accessed 9/15/21). Despite current trends that approve of living together, the Bible’s message stays the same: God forbids sex before marriage.

In addition to the biblical guidance are other sound reasons not to cohabit. The idea that living together is an appropriate “test-drive relationship” before committing to marriage falls apart under scrutiny. Contrary to the conventional wisdom, living together before marriage does not make a future marriage stronger. One study based on a national survey found that couples who had lived together were 46 percent more likely to divorce than other couples (DeMaris, A., and Rao, K. V., “Premarital Cohabitation and Subsequent Marital Stability in the United States: A Reassessment,” Journal of Marriage and Family 54, 1992, based on the National Survey of Families and Households, 178–190). Another study released through Rutgers University found that cohabiting is counterproductive to long-lasting marriages and recommended that unmarried couples avoid living together, especially if the arrangement involves children, due to the uncertainty and tenuousness of cohabitation (Popenoe, D., and Whitehead, B. D., “Should We Live Together? What Young Adults Need to Know about Cohabitation before Marriage,” The National Marriage Project, the Next Generation Series, Rutgers, the State University of New Jersey, 1999).

Even in the case of an unmarried couple who share a living space without having sex, some problems arise:

1) There is still the appearance of immorality. We must consider our testimony before an unbelieving world as we represent Christ. Most people naturally assume that a man and a woman sharing the same living space are sexually active. Even if the assumption is wrong, the implication remains. God calls us to a higher standard: “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people” (Ephesians 5:3). Living together definitely “hints” at sexual immorality.

2) Sharing a living space could be a tremendous temptation for immorality. Cohabiting couples, even if they commit to abstain from sex, are putting themselves in a position that can easily lead to compromise and allow the devil to tempt them. The Bible tells us to flee immorality, not expose ourselves to its constant temptations (1 Corinthians 6:18).

3) We have a responsibility to our brothers and sisters in Christ. The Bible’s admonition is that we do not cause anyone to stumble (Romans 14:19–21). It’s not enough to say, “We’re doing nothing wrong”; we must “pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding” (verse 19, ESV).

If a couple is living together outside of marriage, they have three basic options: (1) continue to live together; (2) find separate living quarters; or (3) get married now. Many couples choose to get married in a quick, private ceremony to make things “legal,” and then have a more formal, church-type wedding celebration later. Of those three options, (2) and (3) are the only godly choices.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Guide to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric & Leslie Ludy

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

Did Esther have sex with Xerxes before they were married?​

ANSWER

Esther 2 describes King Xerxes’ (or Ahasuerus’) search for a new queen of Persia. A group of beautiful young virgins from the city of Susa was selected (verse 3). Among this group was Esther, a Jewess who kept her ethnic background hidden (verse 8).

Esther gained favor with Hegai, the man in charge of these women (verse 8). He provided her with food, cosmetics, and seven female servants (verse 9). Each woman required 12 months of preparation to appear before the king, and then it was only for one night. None of the women would return to the king unless he summoned her by name (verse 14). It appears that each of these women had sexual relations with the king.

Esther 2:13–14 says, “This is how she would go to the king: Anything she wanted was given her to take with her from the harem to the king’s palace. In the evening she would go there and in the morning return to another part of the harem to the care of Shaashgaz, the king’s eunuch who was in charge of the concubines.” The fact that each woman spent the night with the king implies sexual relations.

Esther took her turn after 12 months of preparation, and she was chosen as queen: “She was taken to King Xerxes in the royal residence in the tenth month, the month of Tebeth, in the seventh year of his reign. Now the king was attracted to Esther more than to any of the other women, and she won his favor and approval more than any of the other virgins. So he set a royal crown on her head and made her queen instead of Vashti” (Esther 2:16–17).

Eventually, Esther would rescue her people from genocide, but she first endured the lust of the king. Despite her difficult situation, she trusted in God and helped others as she was able. Through her efforts, many lives were saved, even though it came at great personal cost.

Did Esther have a choice of whether or not to sleep with the king? Her choice was likely either submit or die. Even in those troublesome times, though, God was at work. This young woman, left as an orphan, living as a slave, and serving the lust of a king, became the heroine of Israel. Her brave actions saved a nation and led the Jewish people to a new level of influence in Susa.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

Esther, NIV Application Commentary by Karen Jobes

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[ZhongGuoWang]

What's next? Living together with animals Poor pet dogs

 

[Patriot]

Is born again virginity possible?​

ANSWER

Born-again virginity is the claim that after having sex, a person can be restored to virginity by a spiritual renewal, vowing sexual purity until marriage and asking God for forgiveness. Some women have taken the idea of born-again virginity so far that they actually have had surgery to physically restore themselves to a “virgin” physical-sexual state.

The pressure upon some Christians to become "born-again virgins" is likely due in large part to the fear of condemnation from Christian brothers and sisters, or perhaps fear that God will not accept them unless they take steps to become “born-again virgins.” Neither of these reasons should be a concern because God offers forgiveness and grace to all who ask with a sincere heart (1 John 1:9). We need not try to restore for ourselves what God has already restored in us spiritually.

The Bible says that when we are born again, we are new creations, our old selves are dead and gone, and we have new life given to us by the Holy Spirit of God (2 Corinthians 5:17). This means that God chooses to no longer remember our past transgressions (Jeremiah 31:34), including losing virginity before marriage. Our sins are as far away from us as the east is from the west (Psalm 103:12). There is absolutely no doubt that God will forgive sex before marriage. God’s love for a person is not diminished because of the mistakes that person has made.

However, though our sins are no longer counted against us, they are still very real and still carry with them earthly consequences. Once an act is done, it’s done. It is, therefore, not possible to claim physical born-again virginity, just as it is not possible to reverse the consequences of any other sins we commit. What we can be done with, though, are the guilt feelings associated with having had premarital sex. This kind of guilt can cause us to doubt the power of God’s forgiveness because we can’t forgive ourselves. We can be tyrannized by our emotions and feel we are too bad to be forgiven. There are several reasons for this. First, the conscience speaks against forgiveness. The only thing our conscience knows about is guilt and conviction. It knows nothing of grace and mercy. Second, Satan is the “accuser of the brethren” (Revelation 12:10), and he will do all he can to obscure the love and graciousness of God. But Satan is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:44). Once we recognize that it’s to his advantage to keep us incapacitated and immobilized by our guilt feelings, we can reject his lies, cling to the promises of Scripture, truly believe that we have died to sin, and begin to live for God in Christ (Romans 6:11).

Consider the apostle Paul—consumed with rage against Christ and “breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples” (Acts 9:1), full of blasphemy and ungodliness, yet God forgave him and made Paul His chosen vessel to preach the Gospel to the whole world. Notice that God never required Paul to become a born-again anything other than a born-again believer in Jesus Christ. Paul goes on to tell us that although some of us were sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, homosexual offenders, thieves, greedy, drunkards, slanderers, and swindlers (1 Corinthians 6:9-12), yet through the infinite goodness and free grace of God, we are washed from the filth and guilt of our sins, justified by the righteousness of Christ, sanctified by the Spirit of Christ, and decked and adorned with the precious grace of Christ, holy and perfect in the sight of God. Knowing this, how can we possibly hold onto our guilty feelings?

Rather than seeking born-again virginity, a Christian who has made the mistake of sex before marriage should commit himself/herself to God and to abstaining from sexual intercourse until marriage. Claiming born-again virginity is not biblical. Believing wholeheartedly in God’s total forgiveness and making the choice to live righteously and in ways that are pleasing to Him—that is biblical.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Guide to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric & Leslie Ludy
More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

How can an unmarried person relieve sexual tension in a non-sinful way?​

ANSWER

Of all the gifts God has afforded us, sexuality is one of the most challenging to use wisely, ranking next to controlling the tongue (James 3:2). We know that the sex drive is part of how God made us, and we also know that God commands that sexual expression be limited to the confines of marriage. The unmarried must learn to cope with the build-up of sexual tension in ways that honor God. We can’t get rid of the sex drive, and we should not try to, for it is God’s gift to us. But we certainly should learn how to control the sex drive, use it, and relieve it only within God’s wise guidelines for the good of His people and the glory of His name.

First, we emphasize the fact that the Bible nowhere portrays sexuality in itself as sinful or dirty. We have no reason to feel guilty about our sexual drives. Such urges are normal and God-planned. God created male and female, along with their capacities, drives, and needs for important purposes.

Second, the Bible commands self-control (1 Corinthians 9:24–27; 2 Peter 1:6). So it is only the misuse and abuse of sexual capacities that are wrong. In all areas, including our sexuality, we must “strive for the mastery,” as the KJV says in 1 Corinthians 9:25.

Masturbation, almost always associated with lustful fantasies and pornography, is not an appropriate way to relieve sexual tension. It is always a self-serving act that shows no concern for others. God has provided the male with natural relief of sexual pressure. These are “wet dreams,” sleeping dreams of a sexual nature accompanied by seminal emissions, or ejaculations. Therefore, masturbation is not a necessary means of relieving sexual tension.

For those who wish to be sexually chaste, here are some practical suggestions on how to deal with sexual desire in non-sinful ways:

1. Appreciate reality. Grateful acceptance of your sexual nature and its purposes is key. Instead of trying to get rid of sexual desire, offer it to God. Thank Him for what it means for your future. Do not deny that you have sexual feelings or try to repress them. Instead, in the strength of God, treasure up your power until He leads you in His time to your lifelong mate. In the meantime, redirect your sexual energies into useful service for the Lord.

2. Cultivate a mindset of pleasing and honoring God even with your imagination and self-discipline. So much of today’s media overemphasize sexuality and promote instant gratification as an ideal, making self-control a much-needed virtue. Strengthen your discipline by staying close to God, clothed in His spiritual armor, and trusting your Savior to battle for you.

3. Remember that the Holy Spirit lives in the spirit of a Christian. Your body is the temple of God (2 Corinthians 6:16). The Spirit will master and direct your desires as you invite Him to do so.

4. Let Jesus be your example. He was sacrificially self-disciplined (Luke 9:51; Isaiah 55:4; Matthew 27:11–14). He was “tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin” (Hebrews 4:15), which means He had to manage His sexual drives to the glory of God. The Lord directed all His energies and attention to meeting the deepest needs of lost mankind. Serve alongside of Him, and let Him serve through you.

5. When a sexual urge grows, redirect your thoughts and take steps to dampen the urgency of the desire. Do some exercises, take a walk, or take a cold shower—cooling the body can literally cool sexual urges.

6. Avoid all forms of unnecessary sexual stimulation. Men should remember that their desire is usually stimulated by what the eye sees, so it’s important to avoid any movie, TV, or other visual medium that shows nakedness or sexual activity. Women are often stimulated by emotion or relationship, but can also be impacted by sight. Both genders should be ruthless about this—what they watch, read, and think.

7. Follow Jesus’ advice and don’t look at any person lustfully (Matthew 5:28). Follow Job’s example: “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman” (Job 31:1). Train your mind, your thoughts, your imagination, and your eyes to be chaste as you consider how God might use you constructively in every person’s life.

8. When you wake up in the morning, get up. Lying in bed opens the door to sexual arousal, increasing desire.

9. Work vigorously. Work with all your strength, and at night you will have an easier time falling asleep quickly.

10. Manage your mind. Philippians 4:8 gives you a list of things with which to fill your mind.

11. Sublimate sexual energy into meaningful and satisfying service for others in Christ’s name. Or channel it into exciting and challenging projects and activities that fully occupy your mind.

12. Prepare for the responsibilities of marriage and family. Keep your attention on the long-term benefits of sexual purity.

13. Use your imagination and memory to conjure up physical sights, sounds, smells, feelings, and tastes that you’ve experienced and in which there is no shame. Make your mind work the way you choose.

14. When a sexual urge intensifies, change your environment. Ask a friend to go with you to chat, walk, jog, shop, or do something active and enjoyable.

15. Develop or cultivate a hobby that requires active use of your hands.

16. Take note of what triggers your sexual urges, and avoid it. Do what you can to change the situation associated with the desire. If wrong thoughts follow a certain activity, then stop engaging in that activity.

17. Talk to God about how you are feeling. Share every situation with the Lord Jesus.

18. If you do sin, immediately confess it to Christ and receive His forgiveness (1 John 1:9). Don’t let shame control you. Thank God that Christ already died for all sin, that God’s love is unconditional and His mercy is new every morning. Ask God for victory. In Ephesians 6:10–18, 1 Peter 5:8, and James 4:7–8, God gives you the means of victory over Satan’s attacks.

19. Cultivate close and honest relationships and accountability with other conscientious Christians of the same gender as you. Ask them to pray for you and to be available when you need them.

20. Acknowledge your struggles to someone you can trust, such as your pastor. You are not the first person who has struggled with learning how to manage your sexual nature. Hiding, faking, and acting hypocritically will not help you; they will destroy your character. If you do slip, your confidante can support you with prayer, exhortation, and encouraging guidance.

21. Realize that striving for the mastery may not be easy or quick. Putting on any virtue—chastity, honesty, generosity, or whatever—takes practice and commitment. Paul described self-discipline like this: “I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize” (1 Corinthians 9:26–27).

22. Use music to shift your mind’s thoughts. When you feel sexual cravings, listen to some music with God-focused, Christ-honoring lyrics.

23. Take it a day at a time, depending on God’s grace and keeping your eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of your faith (Hebrews 12:2).

24. And, of course, it is not wrong to get married. Paul, speaking of the unmarried, writes, “If they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1 Corinthians 7:9). At the same time, rushing into marriage so you can have sex is not a wise decision, and it reveals a wrong attitude about what marriage is supposed to be all about.

God designed us to have real relationships, not to indulge the lust of the flesh. The chief purpose of the sex drive is to move us toward our spouses, not to gratify ourselves. Sinful ways of relieving sexual tension can never release anyone from lust; rather, they only reinforce the desire to act out on that lust. Sinful behavior cannot relieve the longing for real intimacy but only adds to the pressure.

Real sexual fulfillment is found in satisfying another. The proper use of sexual power is about loving another, not oneself. By God’s grace and the power of the Holy Spirit, we can learn to postpone sexual fulfillment until we can enjoy the full reality that God designed for sexual intercourse within marriage.

Recommended Resource: Men - Every Young Man’s Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation by Stephen Arterburn.
Women - Every Young Woman’s Battle: Guarding Your Mind, Heart, and Body in a Sex-Saturated World by Shannon Ethridge

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

What does the Bible say about hermaphrodites?​

ANSWER

Babies that are born with both male and female sexual organs, or characteristics of both organs, are called hermaphrodites or intersex. A child who is in an intersexual state is classified in one of three categories: 1) true hermaphrodite – an infant born with both ovaries and testicles and has both male and female sex organs. 2) female pseudohermaphrodite – a genetic female with male external sex organs. 3) male pseudohermaphrodite – a genetic male with external sex organs that fail to develop properly, resulting in female or male/female physical characteristics.

In times past, doctors would perform surgeries without first testing the infant to find out its true sex, and the child would sometimes grow up very obviously a man, with female genitalia. Now, specialists can perform an ultrasound, blood test, chromosome analysis, and even do exploratory surgery to find out the baby’s true sex. The treatment is still controversial, however.

Some believe that surgery and/or hormonal therapy should begin within the first 15 months of life, and others believe these things should be put off until the child is old enough to make his or her own decision about it. There are pros and cons for each side. Either way, any family with an intersexual infant should begin counseling, as should the child when he or she is old enough.

When babies are developing in the womb, they all begin with sex organs that look female. If the baby is male, he begins to produce testosterone, and if the hormone reaches the tissues correctly, the external genitals become a scrotum and penis. Chromosomal or sex hormone abnormalities can produce an infant in an intersexual state. It can also be caused by a condition called congenital adrenal hyperplasia, which is a disease that blocks the baby’s metabolism. It is not as uncommon as we might think; about 1 in every 2,000 newborns is born in an intersexual state.

Babies are not born with physical disorders to punish their parents in any way. Although God created the earth perfectly, it soon brought destruction upon itself with the onset of human sin (Romans 5:12). Before the Flood in Genesis chapter 7 that wiped out almost all living things on the earth, people had the potential to live for several hundred years.

After the Flood, human life spans grew progressively shorter, indicating a change in the environment which resulted in damage to the human genetic structure. This also explains why incest was necessary for the population of the earth in Genesis, but was forbidden later in the laws of Leviticus (18:6-18). Now, thousands of years later as sin continues to permeate the world, the human race has been bombarded with every kind of sickness, disease, disorder and birth defect we can imagine.

It is very possible for a child born with both sex organs to grow up to have a healthy view of sexuality and successful relationships. From early on, the child should be taught how valuable, loved and accepted he is by his family and also by God. He or she is not a victim of divine judgment, but God has a plan for each one of us that will bring Him glory, as we can learn from a man who was healed by Jesus Christ:

“'Teacher,' his disciples asked him, 'why was this man born blind? Was it a result of his own sins or those of his parents?' 'It was not because of his sins or his parents' sins,' Jesus answered. 'He was born blind so the power of God could be seen in him'” (John 9:2-3).

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

What Does the Bible Really Teach About Homosexuality? by Kevin DeYoung

101 Frequently Asked Questions About Homosexuality by Mike Haley

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

Why is sexual temptation a bigger problem for men than for women?​

ANSWER

While women are by no means immune from sexual temptation, generally speaking, men struggle with sexual temptation to a much greater degree. Far more men commit adultery than women. In premarital relationships, men are far more likely to seek sex from their partners than women.

Why is this? Why is sexual temptation a bigger problem for men than for women? The Bible does not seek to answer this “why” question. Instead, the Bible makes it abundantly clear that sexual immorality is always a sin (Acts 15:20; 1 Corinthians 5:1; 6:13, 18; 10:8; 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3; Jude 7). The fact that overcoming sexual temptation is often more difficult for men is definitely not an excuse. “It is so hard to resist” is not an explanation God will accept from a man, or from a woman for that matter. Again, sexual immorality is always a sin. Therefore, sexual temptation is to be overcome (1 Corinthians 6:18), whether the temptation is strong or mild, and whether the person tempted is a man or a woman.

Since the Bible does not specifically give an answer as to why sexual temptation is a greater struggle for men than for women, we can look to biology/physiology for insight. Physiologically, men typically have a much stronger sex drive than women. Men naturally think about sex more often and desire sex more frequently than women do. Especially when sexual intercourse has not occurred recently, the male body has a greater desire for the release that sex provides. This is then compounded by the fact that men are far more easily stimulated by sight than women are (which also explains why men are far more prone to look at pornography). Simply the sight of an attractive female is sometimes enough to trigger a male’s sex drive. If a sexual thought is not immediately forsaken (with God’s help), it can become a cascading river of sexual temptation, very difficult to resist.

Again, let it be said, the male sex drive is a fact, not an excuse. If a man gives in to sexual temptation, he has no one to blame but himself. First Corinthians 10:13 declares, “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” If we do not take advantage of the divinely provided “way of escape,” we are without excuse. Sexual temptation can be powerful, and sexual sin is among the most devastating (1 Corinthians 6:18). But, with God’s help, sexual temptation can be defeated. This is equally true for men and women.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

Every Man’s Battle with Workbook: Winning the War on Sexual Temptation One Victory at a Time by Arterburn, Stoeker, & Yorkey

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

Was it a mistranslation to add the word homosexual to the Bible in 1946?​

ANSWER

Terms such as homosexual did not appear in English Bibles until the twentieth century. Those who claim Scripture fails to condemn same-sex intercourse note this with emphasis. Some, such as the creators of the 2022 film 1946: The Mistranslation That Shifted Culture, point to 1946 as the year the word homosexual was first used; those translations eventually became the Revised Standard Version. A form of this criticism suggests Christians came to condemn same-sex intercourse only after words like homosexual were published in Bibles. The implication is that modern translators inappropriately inserted the concept: that prior to 1946 no one thought Scripture criticized homosexual sex.

Such arguments are deeply flawed. The question of which word circulated in the ancient world is distinct from whether ancient people understood the actions in question. Language and history both provide consistent, strong evidence that Scripture was always understood as condemning physical acts associated with the modern term homosexual. The Bible does not confuse pedophilia with homosexuality, as some claim. The Bible has the same broad prohibitions against sexual deviancy in the Old and New Testaments. In multiple passages, the wording specifically includes the concept of same-sex intercourse.

Imagine a medieval knight scolding his squire for condescendingly lecturing an elderly seamstress about sewing. Modern English might summarize that thirteenth-century encounter as, “The knight rebuked his squire for mansplaining.” The word mansplaining refers to a male presumptuously lecturing a woman about her own area of expertise as if he knows better than she. But this term only appeared in English around 2008. It would be absurd, on the basis that the word did not exist in the Middle Ages, to claim the knight could not have possibly thought that mansplaining was wrong. Yet this is precisely how modern critics attempt to interpret the absence of the word homosexual in English Bibles prior to 1946.

Truly “new” expressions arise to name something recently discovered or to summarize a recurring idea. Words such as vaccine, radar, microprocessor, quark, and submarine were coined to identify something previously unidentified. Those words label things effectively unknown—even nonexistent—in prior cultures. To say ancient writings can’t directly comment on vaccine efficacy or social media ethics is reasonable only insofar as those ideas were totally unknown.

However, some new words are simply novel ways of denoting old concepts. For thousands of years, people knew ideas could rapidly spread within a society. The use of commonly understood symbols and caricatures was well established. Technology boomed in the late twentieth century, making the rapid spread of ideas a common point of discussion. Richard Dawkins effectively coined the term meme in 1976. Afterwards, the word came to mean “an image spread rapidly on the internet.”

To suggest there was no concept of reusing certain words and images as commentary prior to 1976 would be nonsensical. So would be a claim that, until the word meme appeared in print, no one had a notion that ideas could quickly spread. The word meme took its present form only after the turn of the twenty-first century. Yet quickly referencing ideas by putting words and images together was a well-established practice long before. Fully fledged internet memes, as currently known, didn’t exist prior to the late 1990s. But the term meme isn’t entirely wrong when describing characters like Uncle Sam and Alfred E. Neuman or graffiti such as “Kilroy was here” or “for a good time, call. . . .”

Writers in the biblical eras did not categorize sexual orientation exactly as does modern culture. Yet they obviously understood the physical acts in question. Biblical phrases are deliberately broad, as to clearly rebuke erotic contact between persons of the same sex. Modern re-interpreters may twist contexts and conjure ad hoc exceptions for every passage to suggest otherwise. The need for such effort shows how clearly and consistently Scripture presents the same truth.

The consistent historical stance of both Judaism and Christianity further proves this interpretation. Until very recently, almost no one denied that Old and New Testament Scripture define same-sex behaviors as immoral. The subject in question is not part of a shadowy prophecy. It requires no advanced scientific perspective to grasp in full. It does not depend on deep metaphor or symbolism. “Do not do such-and-such a thing with your body” is well within the understanding of any era of history. Arguing that only those living in the modern era can correctly understand that concept is preposterous.

Conceptual definitions such as “sexual orientation” are relatively new. This does not mean persons with various orientations-as-defined-today never existed. In parallel, the modern word neurodivergent refers to persons with conditions such as autism. The word may be new, but the reality it denotes is not. Ironically, the fact that biblical authors lacked modern definitions for sexual orientation counters claims that, because they did not use a certain word, they could have no part of the idea in mind. If the recent origin of the word homosexuality is evidence the Bible doesn’t condemn it, the same thing could apply to racism or misogyny. Words such as homosexuality weren’t part of the English language at all until the late 1800s. Yet what the words describe was part of human experience prior to human use of certain syllables.

The word meme wasn’t used until the end of the twentieth century. But notions of duplicated images and rapidly spreading ideas predate the expression. Mansplaining, racism, and misogyny all existed—and were denounced—before the invention of current English appellations. People did not suddenly begin obsessing over celebrities only after the term stan emerged. For all of history leading up to 1946, Scripture and consistent biblical ethics stood against same-sex intercourse in every context.

Sin is sin, no matter what term it goes by. Use of a new term does not change millennia of Judeo-Christian thinking. Suggestions otherwise amount to a baseless conspiracy theory.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

What Does the Bible Really Teach About Homosexuality? by Kevin DeYoungand101 Frequently Asked Questions About Homosexuality by Mike Haley

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

What does it mean that the marriage bed is undefiled (Hebrews 13:4)?​

ANSWER

Chapter 13 is the concluding chapter of the book of Hebrews and ends with a series of final exhortations to Christians. Verse 4 says, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (NASB). The Greek word translated “undefiled” is only used in this exact form four times in the New Testament, and it means “uncontaminated” or “set apart.” Hebrews 7:26 uses this word to describe Jesus Christ, our high priest, and James 1:27 says that “undefiled” religion is that which helps widows and orphans and remains unstained by the world.

The marriage bed is to be kept pure or undefiled. In other words, the sexual intimacy shared between a husband and wife is to be reserved for that couple alone. God created the sexual union to be between a husband and a wife. Period. Only. No other use of sexuality is ever condoned in Scripture. To abuse or misuse God’s gift of sex is to defile the marriage bed.

A marriage bed can be defiled in several ways:

1. Fornication. When two unmarried people engage in sexual intercourse, they are defiling God’s good gift of sex. Those who have not vowed themselves to each other in a binding lifetime union have no right to exploit the culmination of such a vow. Sex was designed to be the final act of consecration when a couple pledge their lives to each other in a sacred covenant. All forms of sexuality outside a marriage union are bringing dishonor to the honorable institution of marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18).

2. Adultery. When one or both parties in a sexual union are married to someone else, God calls their sexual acts adultery. Adultery was punishable by death under God’s Old Covenant with Israel (Deuteronomy 22:22; Leviticus 20:10). Even though we no longer live under that covenant, adultery is still high on God’s list of moral evils (Matthew 5:28, 32) and is always named as a sin that keeps unrepentant offenders from inheriting the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19; 1 Corinthians 6:9).

3. Homosexuality. Another defilement of the marriage bed is the perversion of men having sex with men or women with women. Despite our world’s current embrace of homosexual practice, this vile act has never been and will never be sanctioned or blessed by God. Homosexuality is a distortion of God’s gift of physical unity between husband and wife and is the only sexual activity labeled an abomination (Leviticus 20:13). The prohibition against homosexuality carries right into the New Covenant, as it is listed with those sins that keep the unrepentant out of the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9; 1 Timothy 1:9–10; Jude 1:7).

4. Prostitution. Proverbs 7 gives a detailed look at the destruction that comes upon a young man who allows himself to be seduced by a harlot. The sin of harlotry is often used as a metaphor for unfaithful Israel (Hosea 4:15; Jeremiah 3:8; Judges 8:33). Christians are warned to avoid such immorality because of the sacredness of the marriage bed (1 Corinthians 6:15–16; Ephesians 5:3).

5. Pornography. Using pornography for sexual gratification is a more modern way to defile the marriage bed. Pornographic books, videos, sexting, and the use of other sexually explicit materials also defile the sanctity of the sexual union between a man and wife. Porn has the effect of bringing strangers into the bedroom, even if only through the eyes. Jesus warned that lust associated with looking at a woman is equivalent to adultery before God (Matthew 5:28). Pornography has elevated sexual lust to an art form, but it is still corrupting to the heart and a sinful defiling of the sexual act.

God created human beings to be pure in body and spirit. Sexual union between a husband and wife was a part of that purity (Genesis 2:24–25). When Adam and Eve sinned, sexuality was tainted along with everything else. Jesus purchased the power to reclaim that purity through His sacrificial death on the cross (2 Corinthians 5:21). No sin, including sexual immorality, is too great for the power of that atoning death and resurrection to pardon. Even though we may have defiled the marriage bed in many ways, God can restore sexual purity and holiness when we repent and commit our lives to following Him (Psalm 51:7; 1 John 1:7).

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

The Act of Marriage by Tim and Beverly LaHaye

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[Patriot]

What does it mean that the marriage bed is undefiled? | GotQuestions.org​

Got Questions Ministries

What does it mean that the marriage bed is undefiled in Hebrews 13:4? A marriage bed can be defiled in several ways: Fornication, Adultery, Homosexuality, Prostitution, and Pornography to name a few. An Undefiled Marriage bed is a key to sexually purity in marriage and knowing how far is too far in marriage according to the Bible. In this video on Hebrews 13 4, Pastor Nelson with Bible Munch answers the question, "What does it mean that the marriage bed is undefiled?"

*** Source Article: https://www.gotquestions.org/marriage...

*** Check out, Bible Munch! https://www.youtube.com/BibleMunch

 

[Patriot]

What does the Bible say about asexuality?​

ANSWER

Physiologically, asexuality is defined as “the state of having no evident sex or functional sex organs; sexless.” Typically, though, asexuality refers to a lack of sexual feelings. Jesus’ mention of “eunuchs” in Matthew 19:12 could be taken as a reference to physiological asexuality, but, for the purposes of this article, we will deal only with the lack of sexual attraction or desire. Is it wrong for a person to not have any sexual desire or attraction whatsoever?

What Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 7 is the closest thing to a biblical mention of asexuality. In verse 1 he says it’s good for a man not to marry. In times of singleness, without the constraints of family, a person can be available to be used by God anywhere and at any time. In contrast, in verses 2-6, Paul writes that marriage is good for those who have a deep passion for the opposite sex. Marriage allows those passions to be fulfilled in a godly way. Paul then makes it clear in verses 7-8 that he was, at that time, not married. God had given Paul the gift of singleness, the ability to be happily and contently unmarried. Does this mean Paul had absolutely no desire for sex and/or no desire to be married? Not necessarily, but whatever Paul’s desire, it clearly was not as consuming as his desire to serve God. Note – in 1 Corinthians 9:5, Paul perhaps indicates a desire to marry.

So, is it wrong for a person to have no desire to get married? According to 1 Corinthians 7, no, it most definitely is not wrong. Remaining single can be a very good thing, as it can free a person to have more time to serve God. Remaining single, though, does not necessarily indicate asexuality, that is, a lack of desire for the opposite sex. The gift of singleness mentioned in 1 Corinthians 7 is the ability to be content without marriage, not necessarily lacking any and all desire for marriage. If one has no desire for marriage/sex, and is confident that this is of the Lord, he/she should use the time of singleness for wholehearted service in God’s kingdom. It would not be wrong, though, to seek medical consultation, to ensure that the asexuality is not due to some sort of hormonal imbalance.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

Authentic Beauty: The Shaping of a Set-Apart Young Woman by Leslie Ludy

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[Patriot]

What is an appropriate level of physical intimacy before marriage?​

ANSWER

The modern view of sex before marriage is quite lax. One study found that 75 percent of American teenagers have had premarital sex. By the time the unmarried turn 44 years old, that number climbs to 95 percent (Finer, L. Public Health Reports, The Guttmacher Institute, January—February 2007, vol 122, pp 73–78). Even among self-identified Christians, 57 percent of U.S. adults believe that premarital sex “in a committed relationship” is sometimes or always acceptable (Pew Research Center, https://pewrsr.ch/3lJyBBE, accessed 11/8/22).

Such statistics are alarming to Christians who take the Bible seriously. Passages such as Ephesians 5:3 give clear guidance concerning physical intimacy outside of marriage: “But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity . . . because these are improper for God’s holy people.” This command places the “guard rails” along a fairly strict path—not even a “hint” of immorality should be found among God’s people.

Determining an appropriate level of physical intimacy before marriage is something every unmarried couple must do. Fornication is categorized as sinful in the Bible, so sexual intercourse before marriage is definitely off limits. Other sexual acts, such as oral or anal sex, would also fall under the definition of fornication. But the boundaries must be even stricter than that: anything that even “hints” of sexual immorality is inappropriate for a Christian.

The Bible does not give us a list of activities that “hint” of immorality. Neither does it tell us what physical activities are “approved” for a couple to engage in before marriage. The idea behind the command is that sexual immorality should not exist among God’s people. Never should there be an occasion for observers to mention such a thing. Any accusation of immorality or inappropriate behavior in the church should be wholly untrue.

Where to draw the line? How much intimacy is too much, before marriage? Since the sexual act is wrong for an unmarried couple, behavior that leads to the act should also be curtailed. Thus, foreplay, which is the natural prelude to sexual intercourse, should be restricted to married couples. Anything that can be considered foreplay should be avoided until marriage. This would logically include fondling, nudity, and erotic conversations and behaviors.

An unmarried Christian couple should know their convictions and stick to them. Some couples may draw the line at light kissing. Others will stop at holding hands. Others will move the barriers even farther out, for conscience’s sake. The important thing is that the individual believer is allowed to live according to his or her own convictions. The conscience should not be violated. If there is any doubt whether an activity is right for an unmarried couple, it should be avoided, just to be safe (Romans 14:23). Christians have been set apart by God for His holy purposes, and we must take care to avoid immorality. Scripture gives strong warning on this matter: “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins. . . . For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life” (1 Thessalonians 4:3– 7).

All sexual activity and foreplay should be restricted to married couples. An unmarried couple should avoid any activity that tempts them toward sex, that gives the appearance of immorality, or that violates the conscience.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Guide to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric & Leslie Ludy

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[Patriot]

Why did Lot offer up his daughters to be gang raped?​

ANSWER

The first incident involving Lot’s daughters appears in Genesis 19:1–11. Two men who were really angels appeared in Sodom where Lot lived with his family. The wicked men of the city surrounded Lot’s house seeking to have homosexual relations with the angels. Lot begged the men of the city not to do this evil thing, and he offered up his two virgin daughters to them instead.

The second incident (Genesis 19:30–38) occurs after Lot and his daughters had fled Sodom just before its destruction. Lot’s wife was destroyed for her disobedience during the journey, and Lot and his two daughters fled to live in a cave in a mountain. Afraid they would never have husbands or children in their hideout, Lot’s daughters plotted to make their father drunk so they could sleep with him and thereby assure that they would have children.

To our modern sensibilities, it’s hard to understand why God would allow these two terrible incidents to occur. We are told in 1 Corinthians 10:11 that the record of the Old Testament is meant as an “example” to us. In other words, God gives us the whole truth about biblical characters, their sin, their failures, their victories and good deeds, and we are to learn from their example, what to do and what not to do. In fact, this is one of the ways God teaches us what we need to know in order to make good choices as believers. We can learn the easy way by knowing and obeying God’s Word, we can learn the hard way by suffering the consequences of our mistakes, or we can learn by watching others and “taking heed” from their experiences.

Scripture does not reveal Lot’s reasoning for offering up his daughters. Whatever his thought process was, it was wrong and indefensible. Based on what is revealed about Lot’s life, one might wonder if he was righteous. However, there is no doubt that God had declared him to be positionally righteous, even during his time in Sodom. “And if God rescued righteous Lot, oppressed by the sensual conduct of unprincipled men (for by what he saw and heard that righteous man, while living among them, felt his righteous soul tormented day after day with their lawless deeds)” (2 Peter 2:7–8). At some point Lot had believed in the coming Messiah, and that faith resulted in a righteous standing before God. It is likely that Lot’s uncle, Abraham, had passed this truth down to him.

What we have in the story of Lot is an illustration of a man who once lived close to his godly relatives and had backslidden and was living according to his sin nature. Lot had moved to Sodom, even though he knew what it was, and he “sat in the gate” (Genesis 19:1). That sounds quite simple, but, in fact, sitting in the gate meant that Lot had so entered into the society of Sodom that he was a judge there (Genesis 19:9). In spite of his position, the men of Sodom had no respect for him because they knew he was a hypocrite.

We may sit in judgment of the culture of that day, but protecting one’s guests required great sacrifice. Was Lot right to offer his own daughters in place of the men the Sodomites wanted? No. We can see in the story that the Lord’s messengers protected Lot and his daughters in spite of Lot’s lack of character and worldly viewpoint. Lot meant to appease the men of Sodom so that the hospitality of his house would not be damaged, but he makes the wrong choice in offering his own daughters, and God’s messengers overruled him.

Genesis 19:31–32 tells us that Lot’s daughters believed there would be no man for them and no children. This may be because they saw the destruction of Sodom and believed they were the only people left on earth. They were trying to preserve the family line. Why did Lot have sex with his own daughters? He got drunk. Yes, his daughters conspired to get him drunk, but Lot willingly drank and, when he was drunk, he lost what little control and common sense he had (Genesis 19:30–38), and this is the final step in Lot’s backsliding. The lesson we can learn from this is, when a person has too much to drink, he does not make good choices and loses control of his morals and operates out of the sinful, carnal nature. As a result of the incest, two children were born, and those two children are the fathers of two nations that have been at odds with and the source of much suffering to Israel down through history.

Why did God allow Lot to offer his daughters, and why did He allow them to commit incest? Sometimes God gives us His reasons for doing something but not very often. The more we get to know God, the more we understand Him and His reasons for doing things. But, again, this doesn’t always happen. We must be very careful when we ask why God does something and be sure we are not calling into question God Himself, His judgment, His character, and His very nature.

The psalmist tells us, “As for God, His way is perfect” (Psalm 18:30). If God’s ways are “perfect,” then we can trust that whatever He does—and the reason for whatever He allows—is also perfect. This may not seem possible to us, but our minds are not God’s mind. It is true that we can’t expect to understand His mind perfectly, as He reminds us, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, says the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isaiah 55:8–9). Nevertheless, our responsibility to God is to obey Him, to trust Him, and to submit to His will, whether we understand it or not.

Lot did the things he did because he chose to live in his old sin nature and do what was easy, and he made choices to flirt with evil instead of living to honor God. As a result, there was suffering for Lot, his wife and daughters, and, by association, the nation of Israel for years to come. The lesson for us is that we need to make choices that do not conform to the world and to submit to the Word of God, which will guide us into living lives that are pleasing to God.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

Genesis: Baker Commentary on the Old Testament Pentateuch by John Goldingay

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[Patriot]

Why did Lot offer up his daughters to be gang raped? | GotQuestions.org​

Got Questions Ministries

The Story of Lot and his daughters raises many questions. Why did lot offer his daughters to be raped? Why did God allow Lot to have sex with his daughters? How are we to understand the story of Lot and his daughters in Genesis 19? In this video, Pastor Nelson with Bible Munch answers the question, "Why did Lot offer up his daughters to be gang raped?” and, “Why did God allow Lot’s daughters to later have sex with their father?”

*** Source Article: https://www.gotquestions.org/Lots-dau...

*** Check out, Bible Munch! @BibleMunch https://www.youtube.com/BibleMunch

 

[Patriot]

Why is virginity so important in the Bible?​

ANSWER

When the Bible uses the word virgin, it refers to an unmarried person who has not had sexual relations (see Esther 2:2 and Revelation 14:4). In today’s culture, many people use the word virginity to express sexual purity; however, many others use a technical definition to find loopholes in moral standards, limiting the word to mean only “the condition of never having gone all the way”—thus, a couple can do anything and everything short of sexual intercourse and still technically call themselves “virgins.” This is an unprofitable word game. Chastity should affect the heart, mind, and soul, not just certain body parts.

The Bible’s emphasis is not so much on a technical or medical definition of virginity as it is on the condition of a person’s heart. The morality we espouse and the actions we choose give evidence of our heart’s condition. The Bible’s standard is clear: celibacy before marriage and monogamy after marriage.

There are three serious reasons to save sex for marriage. First, as believers, we are to obey what God tells us to do. First Corinthians 6:18–20 states, “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” If we are in Christ, He has purchased us with the sacrifice of His life. He is our Lord and we are to honor Him.

The second reason is that we are to fight our spiritual battles wearing the breastplate of righteousness (Ephesians 6:14). We are in a contest between our new nature in Christ and our fleshly desires. First Thessalonians 4:3–7 says, “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister. The Lord will punish all those who commit such sins, as we told you and warned you before. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.” Allowing your body (rather than the Spirit) to control your actions is an act of defiance against God. Godly, loving sex between a husband and wife is giving and unselfish. Using someone to fulfill a desire of the flesh is self-centered and abusive. Even if the partner is willing, you are still helping him or her to sin and negatively altering that person’s relationship with God and others.

The final reason involves the “mystery” of marriage (Ephesians 5:31-32). When God spoke of two people being joined as one, He was referring to something we’re only beginning to understand in a real, physiological way. When two people are intimate, the hypothalamus in the brain releases chemicals that induce feelings of attachment and trust. Having sex outside of marriage results in a person forming an attachment and trusting someone with whom he or she does not have a committed relationship. The definition of trust in the mind deteriorates. To have that kind of link with someone without the security of working together toward God is dangerous. Two individuals who are—even mildly—physiologically obsessed with each other but not committed to growing in God as a couple can be torn from God and His plans for them.

Conversely, if two people make a conscious, deliberate choice to commit to each other in marriage, and then allow the intimacy that releases these chemicals, the body can reaffirm the connection the mind has made. The physiological feelings of trust and attachment are reinforced by the reality of the relationship. In this way, two people become one physically, and that reflects what God has done spiritually.

Marriage is to model the relationship between the church and Christ. A married couple is to serve God in a strong, unified partnership. Sex, along with procreation, was designed by God to strengthen that partnership. Sex outside of marriage creates bonds that tear apart people’s hearts instead of joining them together.

Finally, we need to remember a few things about virginity, and the lack thereof, given God’s grace. Those who come to Christ after engaging in premarital sexual relationships are not virgins; however, they are fully cleansed by Christ at the moment they are saved. God can redeem anyone, and He can heal those who have indulged their fleshly lusts. For those who engaged in premarital sex after becoming a Christian, there is forgiveness in Christ. He can cleanse us from all unrighteousness and bring healing (1 John 1:9). And, in the horrible case of a person victimized by sexual abuse or rape, who may feel that she or he, through no fault of their own, no longer measures up to the ideal standard of “virginity,” Christ is able to restore her or his spirit, heal her or his brokenness, and grant her or him wholeness.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

When God Writes Your Love Story: The Ultimate Guide to Guy/Girl Relationships by Eric & Leslie Ludy

More insights from your Bible study - Get Started with Logos Bible Software for Free!

 

[Patriot]

What does the Bible say about an open marriage?​

ANSWER

An open marriage is generally defined as a marriage in which one or both spouses are allowed by the other spouse to have sex with other people. The two primary types of open marriages are polyamory and swinging. Polyamory is when the extramarital affairs purportedly involve emotional love. Swinging is when the extramarital affairs only involve recreational/casual sex.

No, the Bible nowhere explicitly addresses polyamory, swinging, or the idea of an open marriage. The idea that one spouse should consent to the other spouse having sex with other people is absolutely foreign to the Bible. The Bible speaks of sex within marriage as pure (Hebrews 13:4). The Bible speaks of sex outside of marriage as immoral and adulterous (1 Corinthians 6:13, 18; 10:8; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3).

The question is sometimes raised as to whether a polyamorous relationship should be considered adultery if the other spouse allows, approves, or even participates in it. The answer is an unequivocal yes, it is adultery! God is the one who defines what marriage is and what adultery is. God, in His Word, has declared sex outside of marriage to be adultery (Exodus 20:14). A spouse’s giving permission to sin does not overrule God’s Law. We do not have the authority to create exceptions to what God has declared to be sinful.

Aside from the biblical declarations that they are sin, polyamorous relationships cannot fulfill what the Bible says a marriage is to be. A married couple cannot be “one flesh” (Genesis 2:24) if multiple “fleshes” are involved. A married couple cannot fully love one another if that love is divided among other people. There cannot be true intimacy if what is supposed to be intimate is shared with others. Polyamory is not marriage. In no sense is a marriage supposed to be open to sexual activity outside of the marriage.

The sexual union between a husband and wife is meant to be exclusive and “never to be shared”:
“Drink water from your own cistern,
running water from your own well.
Should your springs overflow in the streets,
your streams of water in the public squares?
Let them be yours alone,
never to be shared with strangers” (Proverbs 5:15–17).

Polyamory is, in reality, “poly-lust-ory.” There is nothing loving about it. This perversion of marriage is confirmation of our tendency to repeat Genesis 6:5 (“every intention of the thoughts of the human heart was only evil all the time”) and Judges 21:25 (“everyone did as they saw fit”).

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

A Biblical Portrait Of Marriage, DVD Set by Bruce Wilkinson

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[Patriot]

Did David rape Bathsheba?​

ANSWER

Few words carry more emotional charge than rape. The act most frequently associated with that term is among the most heinous crimes humans can commit. The serious nature of the subject means any use of words like rape should be considered carefully. Modern culture is increasingly using phrases such as power rape when pressure or persuasion, but not outright violence or threats, are involved. As part of those discussions, some ask if 2 Samuel chapter 11 implies that David raped Bathsheba. Oversimplifying a response would be dangerous. A simplistic “yes” or “no” is unfair to Scripture, facts, reason, and rape victims alike. A careful look at the biblical account clearly condemns David’s behavior, but more aggressive interpretations are not supported.

The most common error in Bible interpretation is eisegesis: “reading in” facts or ideas. This is the opposite of exegesis: reading what the actual text says. One form of eisegesis is assuming nefarious deeds when the text does not include them. It’s true the Bible doesn’t always provide minute details, but we need to be careful not to assume something is true unless Scripture gives us overwhelming reasons. In the case of David and Bathsheba, limited details result in limited conclusions.

The matter of David and Bathsheba is recorded in 2 Samuel 11:1–5. David was walking on his palace roof while his generals were off fighting in a war. From that vantage point, he saw an especially beautiful woman bathing. He sent for her and had sex with her, and she became pregnant with his child. David then attempted a cover-up that brought consequences lasting the rest of his life. Bathsheba later became one of David’s wives and eventually the mother of the next king, Solomon.

Many different interpretations can be “read into” this account. Some are more plausible than others. Some are inconsistent with the context of the story and the persons involved. Before using terms like rape to describe what happened, we must have an accurate understanding of biblical facts regarding both David and Bathsheba. Various interpretations offered include the following:

Claim: David raped Bathsheba. Using the common understanding of rape to mean one person violently forcing himself on another, this interpretation is not supported by the Bible. There is no indication from the text that rape led to Bathsheba’s pregnancy. Other Old Testament passages depicting violent rape (Genesis 34:1–2; 2 Samuel 13:14) use different terminology than this account. Nothing in Scripture supports the idea that David overpowered Bathsheba and forcibly defiled her.

Claim: Bathsheba seduced David. Some suggest Bathsheba’s choice to bathe naked in a place that David could see was deliberate: that she was intentionally seducing King David. This is extremely implausible, according to the context of these Scriptures. His nighttime walk on the roof seems to have been spur-of-the-moment, making it extremely unlikely Bathsheba would know of his presence. Bathsheba was bathing late at night, most likely in an enclosed courtyard or garden of her home, and only someone from a higher vantage would be able to see her at all—she was not flaunting herself in public.

Further, the text of 2 Samuel seems to go out of its way to ascribe all actions to David. Bathsheba bathes, obeys the king’s summons, and later tells him she is pregnant. All other actions are overtly credited to David. That may be because David is seen as the spiritually responsible party, much as Adam is considered the responsible party at the Fall (Genesis 3:17–149; Romans 5:12). What’s more likely is the Bible is being crystal clear that David, no one else, initiated this encounter.

Claim: The sex was consensual. Another suggestion is that sex between David and Bathsheba was entirely mutual. This implies their initial encounter was simply (and sinfully) casual sex between consenting adults. It is possible Bathsheba gladly slept with David. The text does not say Bathsheba ever expressed interest in David. In the end, it’s impossible to say with certainty how interested Bathsheba was in sleeping with David. Their later marriage seems to have been close (2 Samuel 12:24) and loyal (1 Kings 1:28–31).

Claim: David “power raped” Bathsheba. This theory suggests Bathsheba did not say “no” to David, but neither did she say “yes.” In other words, she was not truly willing to sleep with him, but he was the king. Those favoring this view point out that King David sends lackeys to collect Bathsheba and bring her to his home, where they have sex the same night. Without question, there is a tremendous imbalance of power between David and Bathsheba. As with the prior scenario, it is possible that Bathsheba felt pressure, even fear, and submitted to sex rather than actively sought it.

Further, the unique phrasing of the text seems to deliberately emphasize David’s actions and downplay those of Bathsheba. When Nathan eventually confronts David about his sin, the allegory he uses depicts the guilty party—David—as making a predatory choice to take something that did not belong to him (2 Samuel 12:1–7). The consequences suffered as a result of this event seem to fall entirely on David, as well (2 Samuel 12:10–14).

Conclusion: Read from the Bible, not into it. There is no question but that the Bible strongly condemns David concerning this incident. There is no sense in which Scripture defends his actions. Nor is there any indication in Scripture that Bathsheba initiated the sin or was considered overtly complicit in it. At the same time, there is nothing in the Bible indicating that David applied force, threats, or violence against Bathsheba.

Rape is an awful subject, and modern discussions of rape often force an awkward distinction. Today’s culture has a confusing habit of applying established words to new ideas in order to leverage emotional impact. For example, words like genius and forever have been applied in so many contexts that the literal meaning of those words is all but forgotten. This is not always done with evil intent; the objective is usually to seize attention or to comment on the morality or immorality of the new idea. However, burdening words with new definitions can blur formerly distinct concepts.

A consequence of this is dilution in the language. When lesser acts are consistently labeled with an extreme term, the original word starts to lose potency. For example, rape has a traditional meaning, but some people today claim that “rape” could be any sex for which one feels regret after the fact. Such an application of the word rape lessens the impact of the word. As the meaning continues to be diluted, victims of rape, as originally defined, may find less initial sympathy for their claims.

All this is to say we must be extremely careful about saying things such as “David raped Bathsheba.” Based on the historic use of the word rape, implying violent, forcible, or threat-coerced sex, the claim that “David raped Bathsheba” is entirely false. Nothing in Scripture hints at such a thing. Use of the word rape without extensive context is certain to cause misunderstanding. Worse, it can contribute to dilution of the seriousness of the term rape as used in other contexts.

Saying “David took advantage of Bathsheba” is much more accurate. The royal power David wielded and the rapid nature of the encounter argue strongly for that view. It is likely Bathsheba was submitting to the experience much more than seeking it. Given her era’s state of women’s rights and David’s role as king, there is no question David was in position to apply extraordinary pressure on her.

The least-flattering interpretation one can reasonably apply to Bathsheba is that she relished the attention of a powerful man. But that only vaguely answers why the narrative seems to blame David—and only David—for what happened. The far more plausible interpretation is that she obeyed the summons of a king and yielded to his desires in a state of vulnerability.

For those reasons, any use of the term rape in connection to this incident should be avoided. Words can change their meaning over time, and the concept of rape seems to be experiencing such an evolution. For now, however, the word most often evokes a particular act, one that Scripture does not support having occurred.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

David - A Man of Passion and Destiny by Charles Swindoll

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[Patriot]

If a couple gets pregnant before marriage do they have to get married?​

ANSWER

Sex before marriage has become so commonplace in our society, even to the point of being expected, that many professing Christians don’t even consider it to be a sin. Our culture assumes that people do not possess the amount of self-control necessary for abstaining until marriage, so the idea has become unrealistic. God’s Word does not change, however, and the Bible tells us that sex outside of marriage is immoral (Matthew 15:19; 1 Corinthians 6:9, 6:13, 7:2; 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3).

Any person who has become a born-again Christian by putting his or her faith and trust in Christ no longer belongs to himself. First Corinthians 6:18-20 (NLT) says, “Run away from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. Or don’t you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”

Disregarding God’s plan for marriage, sex, and family always results in these kinds of spiritual or physical consequences: grieving the Holy Spirit (Ephesians 4:30), guilt, shame, regret, loss of respect for self and others, division in families and between believers, poor role modeling, pain for future spouses, unwanted pregnancies, abortion, and sexually transmitted diseases. God intends for sex to be an intimate expression of love and commitment, to be shared only between a husband and wife. Sex just for the physical pleasure of it damages our spirituality and pulls us away from fellowship with God.

Anyone who has made the mistake of having sex outside of marriage can be forgiven, even if the mistake results in an unplanned pregnancy. First John 1:9 says, “But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from every wrong.” This does not mean that He will erase the consequences of our actions, but we can be restored spiritually by confessing and repenting from our sins. This means turning away from our sins and making the commitment to love and serve Christ.

There are some cases in which getting married before the baby is born would be wise. If a committed couple who was already planning to get married commits fornication which results in pregnancy, it would probably make it easier for the family and the child to marry before he or she is born. But if an uncommitted couple commits the same sin, getting married will not make them right in God’s eyes. In such a situation, getting married will only set them up for marital failure. The Bible does not instruct people as to whether or not to marry under these circumstances, although both parents are still obligated to support the child emotionally, spiritually and financially.

None of us are made right with God through works. We are saved by faith alone, trusting in Jesus Christ to save us from our sins, which lead to death. The Bible says, “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23). God does not want us to try to right our wrongs, but He wants us to give Him our hearts. By laying down our own will and submitting to the sovereignty of God, we can be assured of not only a fulfilling life on earth, but also a place in heaven for eternity.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

The Ten Commandments of Dating by Young & Adams

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[Patriot]

Does the Greek word arsenokoitai in 1 Corinthians 6:9 really mean ‘homosexuals’ or something else?​

ANSWER

In 1 Corinthians 6:9–10 Paul lists some sinful lifestyles that give evidence that a person is not saved: “Do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men . . . will inherit the kingdom of God.” In other words, a practicing, unrepentant idolater, adulterer, or homosexual is fooling himself if he thinks he is going to heaven. Christians are saved from such sins.

There are some interpreters today who object to lumping homosexuals in with the other sinners listed in this passage. The wording “men who have sex with men” is unclear, they say, and should not be construed as a condemnation of all same-sex activity. In an attempt to make homosexual behavior compatible with Christianity, they attempt to redefine the Greek word.

The phrase “men who have sex with men” (translated “homosexuals” in the NASB) is a translation of the Greek word arsenokoitai. Those who object to this translation say that arsenokoitai does not refer to all homosexual relationships but only to those involving abuse, coercion, or unfaithfulness. They say the word does not refer to “loving, faithful” same-sex relationships.

Arsenokoitai is a compound word: arseno is the word for “a male,” and koitai is the word for “mat” or “bed.” Put the two halves together, and the word means “a male bed”—that is, a person who makes use of a “male-only bed” or a “bed for males.” And, truthfully, that’s all the information we need to understand the intent of 1 Corinthians 6:9.

As in English, the Greek word for “bed” can have both sexual and non-sexual meanings. The statement “I bought a new bed” has no sexual connotation; however, “I went to bed with her” does. In the context of 1 Corinthians 6:9, koitai connotes an illicit sexual connotation—the apostle is clearly speaking of “wrongdoers” here. The conclusion is that the word arsenokoitai refers to homosexuals—men who are in bed with other men, engaging in same-gender sexual activity.

The notion that some homosexual relationships are accepted is not even hinted at in this passage. The men’s commitment level or the presence of “love” is not addressed. The idea that the condemned same-sex activity is linked to economic exploitation or abuse is also a forced reading with no textual basis.

Paul’s reference to “homosexuals,” together with a reference to “effeminate” men in the same verse (in the NASB), effectively covers both active and passive homosexual behavior. God’s Word is not open to personal interpretation in this matter. Homosexuality is wrong; it always has been, and it always will be.

Just two verses later, 1 Corinthians 6:11 says, “And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (emphasis added). This statement negates the idea of “homosexual Christianity” being acceptable to God. Paul tells the Corinthian believers that practices such as homosexuality were evidences of their former life before Christ. Now they have been born again, and they have a new nature and new desires. The old nature remains, and the temptations continue, but child of God has been called to fight against sin, not live in it any longer. By the life-changing grace of God, the Corinthians’ new life stands in opposition to the way they used to live.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

What Does the Bible Really Teach About Homosexuality? by Kevin DeYoung

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[Patriot]

What makes sexual sin such a big deal?​

ANSWER

Modern culture has tried to redefine sexuality as a personal right to be exercised any way an individual wishes. Sexual behavior is considered a personal choice, akin to the decision of whether to buy a house or rent a condo. At the same time, popular opinion has all but removed the word sin from our culture’s vocabulary. The only sexual expression considered “wrong” is what is deemed distasteful to the definer. However, social acceptability varies so greatly that even the vilest of acts would be considered justified by many. So, before we can determine why sexual sin is such a big deal, we have to define sexual sin.

Fortunately, man has never been given the privilege of defining sin. The One who created sexuality also has the right to set the boundaries for it, and the Bible is clear about the guidelines. When God created the first man, Adam, and brought to him the first woman, Eve, He joined them together in marriage and pronounced it “very good” (Genesis 1:31; 2:18, 24). At that time, God introduced sexuality and set the boundaries for its expression. God created a union between a husband and wife that He called “becoming one flesh” (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:8; Ephesians 5:31). He then defined any sexual activity outside of the husband-wife relationship as a violation of His gift. Fornication, homosexuality, pornography, and lust are all violations of God’s intent when He created the sexual act (1 Corinthians 6:9,18; Galatians 5:19-20; Jude 1:7; Matthew 5:28; Hebrews 13:4).

So why is the violation of those boundaries such a big deal? The first clue lies in Genesis 2:24 with the words “one flesh.” There is great unifying power within the sexual union. God designed it to involve not only bodies but hearts and lives. Sex was designed to consummate the lifetime union between a man and woman. Jesus said, “What God has joined together let no one separate” (Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:9). He designed male and female bodies differently so that they could come together in an act of physical intimacy that joins them together for life. They “are no longer two, but one flesh” (Mark 10:8). The act of becoming one creates a new entity: a family. This powerful force also brings forth new life (Genesis 4:25). The human race can only be propagated by the coming together of a man and a woman. And, within marriage, God blesses it (Genesis 1:28; 9:27; Psalm 17:3). Sex is a gift to a husband and wife to make their relationship unique among all other relationships.

However, what God creates as good, Satan perverts. Satan began his insidious defilement in the Garden of Eden with the words “Has God said?” (Genesis 3:1). And that challenge to the authority of God continues still. When we use sexuality for entertainment or to satisfy lust, we cheapen the beauty of this powerful gift and defy the One who designed it. We also reap the consequences of our sin. Our sexual disobedience has produced a world staggering under the weight of disease, abortion, perversion, child molestation, addiction, and sexual exploitation. God created boundaries for our good so that we could enjoy His gift as it was designed to be enjoyed.

Electricity is a powerful and helpful thing if used correctly. However, misused or abused, electricity can be deadly. The same is true of sexuality. Misused, sex is also deadly. Abusing God’s gift produces problems such as abortion, poverty, rape, adultery, divorce, and pornography. Sexual sin begins with temptation, as all sin does. When we refuse to acknowledge God’s boundaries, we allow lust to dictate our choices. And lust never leads in the right direction. James 1:13-15 says, “Let no one say when he is tempted, ‘I am being tempted by God’; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.”

Another reason sexual sin is such a big deal is that it destroys the picture of the unbreakable covenant God has with His people. The Bible uses marriage as a metaphor to describe the covenant relationship Jesus has with His “bride,” those whom He has bought with His own blood (Revelation 19:7; 2 Corinthians 11:2). In the Old Testament, God often compared rebellious Israel to a wayward wife, using adultery as a picture of the most heinous of sins (Jeremiah 3:6). God created the sex act to be a consummation of a covenant relationship—a covenant in which God has participated (Malachi 2:14; Matthew 19:6; Mark 10:9). The marriage covenant illustrates God’s unbreakable covenant with us. To engage in sex outside of marriage violates God’s intention and brings serious consequences.

Sexual sin defiles more than just our physical bodies (1 Corinthians 6:18). It has spiritual significance. Almost every book of the Bible renounces sexual immorality, indicating that God considers it a grave sin. Committing sexual sin is directly opposed to God’s will to sanctify us (1 Thessalonians 4:3).

Romans 13:13–14 outlines the life God desires us to live: “Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh.” Sexual sin is one more way people gratify the flesh rather than walk in the Spirit (Galatians 5:16). Jesus said that the “pure in heart” will “see God” (Matthew 5:8). Unrepentant sexual sin defiles the heart, making it impossible to experience the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives. If we wish to be pure in heart, we cannot engage in sexual sin.

FOR FURTHER STUDY​

Undefiled: Redemption from Sexual Sin, Restoration for Broken Relationships by Harry Schaumburg

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