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Singapore's dark secret: female genital mutilation

UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset

From birth to motherhood, a Singaporean Malay’s experience of Female Genital Cutting​

https://sahiyo.com/2017/02/13/from-...-malays-experience-of-female-genital-cutting/



Sir. Smokey the Artist

Sir. Smokey the Artist

4 months ago
I used to think that fgm was a punishment i had to carry being born muslim until i realized that it wasnt islam, but culture. This is not islam, not one bit. I am a singaporean who undergo fgm and i felt absolutely betrayed, violated, and ashamed when i found out about it while shifting through my PARENT'S DIVORCED PAPERS, at 12 years old. It made so much sense why i couldn't feel as 'good', as the other girls in the pornos...i was cut and it scarred me more then anyone would ever know. It all happened when my grandmother took me as a baby while my mom was out at work and cut me WITHOUT her consent. It hurts even to write this, i wish i could give more context but if you have any questions i'll try my best to answer.





Saza Faradilla was 22 when she discovered her genitals had been cut when she was a baby, part of a quietly persistent traditional practice among Singapore's minority Muslim community.

The Asian city-state is modern and cosmopolitan but social values remain conservative and female genital mutilation -- banned in much of the world -- is not illegal.

Although the practice is believed to be widespread among the ethnic Malay Muslim minority, many do not realise they have been subject to it until they are teens or adults.


"I felt very betrayed," said Saza, only learning she had undergone the procedure when she protested about a young relative facing the same thing.

"I was extremely shocked and I felt very, very violated," the 26-year-old told AFP, adding she confronted her mother about it.

"She said that you were cut because I didn't want you to be adulterous, because it's clean -- and because it's part of the religion."

Known in Singapore by the Malay language term "sunat perempuan", it often involves cutting the clitoris or clitoral hood.

The procedure is less extreme than that practised elsewhere, but local activists -- who prefer to use the term "female genital cutting" -- condemn it as a violation and are campaigning to end it.

Saza and a group of mostly Muslim women use Instagram and pamphlets to debunk myths, and run workshops to support those who have undergone it.

- Taboo topic -

But taking on the taboo topic is fraught with difficulties.

The activists have been accused of not being good Muslims, while some members have not told their families about their involvement to avoid tension.

And they say the Malay community's reticence to openly discuss topics like female sexuality makes tackling the issue even more challenging.

The true scale of female genital mutilation worldwide is unclear, but the United Nations estimates at least 200 million girls and women alive today have undergone the procedure in 31 countries across Africa, the Middle East and Asia.

Some Muslims believe it is important for girls' health and moral development, or accept it unquestioningly as part of tradition.

They think it reduces a woman's libido, and lowers the chances of them being unfaithful.

The World Health Organisation, however, warns the practice has no health benefits, is risky, a violation of girls' rights and "an extreme form of gender discrimination".

There is no official data on how common it is in Singapore but 75 percent of Muslim women surveyed by Saza's group had undergone genital cutting.

About 10 percent of ethnic Chinese-dominated Singapore's 5.7 million inhabitants are ethnic Malay Muslims.

The Islamic Religious Council of Singapore, which provides religious guidance to Muslims in the city-state, has spoken out against the practice.

The body "holds the position that any form of procedure which has been medically proven to bring harm, including female genital mutilation... should be avoided", a spokesperson told AFP.

- 'Meaningless gesture' -

But there is little sign of a major shift away from the practice in Singapore, and there remains no official ban on it.

Saza, who works in the education sector, believes the government has chosen to say little publicly on the matter as it treads a careful line to avoid upsetting either the local Muslim community or international rights groups.

Health officials did not answer questions sent by AFP.

Activists are not pushing for a ban for fear the practice could be pushed underground, but want health officials to state publicly it is not medically necessary and the Islamic council to state it is not a religious obligation.

Changing old habits is tough, however.

Zubee Ali, a member of Saza's group, underwent the procedure as a young child and refused to put her own two daughters through it despite social expectations.

But the 59-year-old was unable to prevent her siblings from taking her nieces and grand-nieces for it.

It is a "meaningless gesture that has no bearing at all in the way our girls should grow up", she said.

For Zubee, there is a deeper pain -- she feels having her clitoral hood cut has robbed her of something forever.

"I will never know what it's like to be whole or pure," Zubee said. "It has been taken away from me."


https://sg.finance.yahoo.com/news/ultra-modern-singapores-dark-secret-020246849.html
 
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Leongsam

High Order Twit / Low SES subject
Admin
Asset
My Malay girlfriend was a victim of this procedure but it made no difference whatsoever to her libido. She was hornier and more orgasmic than any of the other non muslims girls I have been fortunate enough to have sex with.

If the procedure is supposed to make them less likely to stray I have to say it does not work very well.
 

laksaboy

Alfrescian (Inf)
Asset
The Islamic Religious Council of Singapore, which provides religious guidance to Muslims in the city-state, has spoken out against the practice.

Here's a better idea: shut this down.

 

Loofydralb

Alfrescian
Loyal
The muslim community knows and understands that clowns and bootlickers run muis and the syariah courts to satisfy their political masters instead of strictly adhering to the sunnah.
But that's another issue.
Female genital mutilation, is not an act demanded by Islam. Only circumcision for men, is.
So this is another good example for non muslims to see that Islam is not what is practised by its followers, but it must be what is specified in the Quran and Hadiths. Its like an unchangeable constitution.
 

UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
EDMWer SpecialKeyboardService is terribly ignorant for posting :
https://forums.fuckwarezone.com.sg/...hijab-may-be-a-divisive-topic.6570345/page-10

How come only jjww about fgm?
Male one can cut, but female one cannot cut?
Sum ting wong?????


He thinks male circumcision is equivalent to FGM. The equivalent is chopping off his cock entirely. FGM has several different extents. In more extreme cases (eg. Africa, Singapore as well?), the entire clitoris is cut off, and the girl can no longer experience orgasms for her entire life. Are most Singaporeans as ignorant as this EDMWer?

1628246815514.png


And majority of EDMWers as well as Sg Redditors defer to religious practices as priority when it comes to FGM, not understanding that it is a basic human rights issue (even on religious grounds, as Loofydralb pointed out, it is misguided muslims, not Islam itself, who think FGM is necessary).


 
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UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
Another EDMWer Starcraft Terran who totally doesn't understand that FGM (greatly harmful, most cases are not 'symbolic little cuts' like he naively thinks) and male circumcision (harmless or even beneficial) is absolutely incomparable :
https://forums.fuckwarezone.com.sg/...ate-even-from-muslim-community.6572205/page-2


I'm just surprised when she said she wants mandatory counselling before parents decide to send their daughter for female circumcision ?
But she never said parents must have counselling before their sons are sent for male circumcision ?

Implicitly, in her mind, she believes female circumcision is backward and harmful.

Imagine if a Malay Muslim male MP says, he wants compulsory counselling for parents before they send their sons to male circumsision.

It would be so weird and disrespectful.

Mandatory counselling....it's like someone wants to suicide or have abortion or something bad...it's already a form of mocking.

Btw Singapore Malay Muslim female doctors just perform a symbolic little cut, it's nothing drastic. I am not an expert but I would say the male one looks more drastic and painful. So it's not as dramatic and exaggerated as she thinks. In her mind this is a form of oppression or something like that.
Singaporean Malay Muslim female doctors are not stupid or extremists.

Meanwhile she wants to campaign for tudung, let Muslim women show more religiosity.

Then why she wants Muslim women to show religiosity on one issue (tudung), but not on another issue (female circumsision)?

There is totally no ideological consistency here.
Like

Reactions:CircuitBreakerKia
 

UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset

From birth to motherhood, a Singaporean Malay’s experience of Female Genital Cutting​

https://sahiyo.com/2017/02/13/from-...-malays-experience-of-female-genital-cutting/

By: Anonymous

Country: Singapore

Community: Malay Muslim

Growing up:

I was told as a child, that every girl had to go through it. There is basically NOBODY that you know who hasn’t gone through it. And I BELIEVED everything my mother said.

Perceptions Ingrained in our Minds:

It is dirty, unhygienic, curbs your sexual desires. Basically, what their mothers tell them, they relay it back to us.

Working adult:

I became a nurse. I studied, learned, saw the anatomy of the human body. As a nurse, I cleaned the vagina of women of different ethnicities. Of course, I noticed the difference. They had the hood and the two labia folds, and I did not.

At that time, as a Malay Muslim, I firmly believed that “my vagina is cleaner” than those who were not circumcised. I felt I belonged to a much “higher status” because I was “cut” and they were not. My fellow female Muslim nurses shared the same sentiments.

Marriage:

I had an inter-racial Musli
couple man woman wearing brunei islamic traditional costume clothe dress male female vector illustration veil and malaysia malay
m marriage. I realized my sexual desire plummeted and I wasn’t really interested in sex much longer. I had a private conversation with my husband about it, and he was surprised that FGC was done in many Asian countries. He mentioned that as a Muslim himself, in his own country, FGC was not done. In his country none of his sisters underwent FGC.

Delivery:

I had a natural home birth for my first born daughter, assisted by my own husband.

The way the delivery occurred was unplanned, but it was the most beautiful experience for us both.

Post-Partum Worries:

The natural delivery left a stinging burning sensation on my clitoris region. I naturally thought it will go away. But it prolonged much longer that I expected.

A few months passed, and I still felt a strange sensation in my clitoris region. When I urinated, it felt like someone had punched me – it was sore. I refused to go for a health check-up as I didn’t want ANYONE to touch me. I didn’t want to touch it myself.

It’s coming to 10 months now past my baby’s birth, and my husband and I haven’t resumed sex yet. At first, I was fearful of the pain that might arise. Then, I didn’t want to experience any more intermittent sore sensation in my clitoris region. Thirdly, I didn’t have the sexual drive or desire mainly because I was breastfeeding.

I deeply pondered: Why am I still feeling this? Why does it still felt sore? Is it because of the FGC that my mother made sure I underwent when I was still a baby?

I haven’t talked to my mother about it yet. I guess no one talks openly about it. They just “snip it” when you’re a baby and everyone stays silent about it. I had many questions in mind! Was it done by trained personnel? Does the answer to that question matter anyway, since it’s wrong to do it?

My Baby and Social Pressure about FGC:

My mother kept insisting that I bring my baby for “sunat” to the clinic. She said it will be “over before you know it” – swiftly done.

My husband, on the other hand, refused to have it done to our daughter. He said women in his country did not have it done.

I started my own journey of reading and gaining more knowledge on FGC.

In 2016, at 30 years of age, it affects me now. I was upset that my mother did it purely due to social pressure. Even if you’re an educated woman, social pressure can still influence the way you make a decision.

I was in a mosque a few weeks back, a lady in her 50-60s approached me and chatted about my baby. She handed me her name card which indicated her business services. It read, “sunat perempuan”. I was shocked and disappointed. It is 2017, and still, this is being done by an unlicensed passerby who easily roamed the community promoting her services.

At present:

I joined a Facebook Group for young mothers in Singapore where women’s topics are discussed. One of the issues asked by many young mothers is “WHERE can I take my NEWBORN DAUGHTER for sunat? Which clinic is best?”

This question showed that young educated mothers are still unaware of FGC and its non-relation to Islam. They continue it because THEIR own mothers tell them to do it or that it is the NORM to perform “sunat” after you give birth to your newborn.

There they go, commenting and discussing the rate of several clinics, the packages that come with it (Ear Piercing + Sunat) and their good experience with the doctors who provided such packages to benefit themselves.

Every time I see such questions, I cringe. I commented on those posts about FGC but nobody has taken notice of my comments. Yes, I do hear mother’s voice that they are fearful to see the procedure done on their baby girls, YET they want it done. How conflicting! Other mothers who had undergone it with their newborn baby girls started giving reassurance that “it’ll be over before you know it. Stay strong mummy!” Subsequently, I messaged the mothers privately and gave them social media links (videos/texts) to educate themselves on FGC, especially on Islamic & social views.

It’s still a very long road to adjust the mindset of the Singapore Malay Muslim community on FGC. It’s done openly without a tinge of guilt in their hearts.

I’m sad it was done on me but I will NEVER let it happen to my offsprings.
When we educate the women, we educate the entire nation. Women have to choose wisely what is right and wrong. Don’t succumb to social pressure – just because everyone is doing it, doesn’t make it right.
 

syed putra

Alfrescian
Loyal
My Malay girlfriend was a victim of this procedure but it made no difference whatsoever to her libido. She was hornier and more orgasmic than any of the other non muslims girls I have been fortunate enough to have sex with.

If the procedure is supposed to make them less likely to stray I have to say it does not work very well.
The mslays improvised and made their females more horny instead. Now i can understand how all malay fathers must endure when daughters make the first move.
 

UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset

Sir. Smokey the Artist

Sir. Smokey the Artist

4 months ago
I used to think that fgm was a punishment i had to carry being born muslim until i realized that it wasnt islam, but culture. This is not islam, not one bit. I am a singaporean who undergo fgm and i felt absolutely betrayed, violated, and ashamed when i found out about it while shifting through my PARENT'S DIVORCED PAPERS, at 12 years old. It made so much sense why i couldn't feel as 'good', as the other girls in the pornos...i was cut and it scarred me more then anyone would ever know. It all happened when my grandmother took me as a baby while my mom was out at work and cut me WITHOUT her consent. It hurts even to write this, i wish i could give more context but if you have any questions i'll try my best to answer.
 
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JohnTan

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
I used to think that fgm was a punishment i had to carry being born muslim until i realized that it wasnt islam, but culture. This is not islam, not one bit.

That moslem bitch is still in denial. FGM is in the moslem religion. Try getting moslem religious leaders to ban FGM the same way they ban pork.
 

syed putra

Alfrescian
Loyal
That moslem bitch is still in denial. FGM is in the moslem religion. Try getting moslem religious leaders to ban FGM the same way they ban pork.
Current doctors don't really practice FGM anymore in jiu hu if i am correct.
And malay parents are not really imposing this onto their daughters.
 

JohnTan

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
Current doctors don't really practice FGM anymore in jiu hu if i am correct.
And malay parents are not really imposing this onto their daughters.

According to the article, FGM is still practiced in Singapore. It's very barbaric, uncivilized and cruel. But it is done in the name of the moslem god allah. For the sake of the younger generations of m&ds, I hope you are correct.
 

syed putra

Alfrescian
Loyal
According to the article, FGM is still practiced in Singapore. It's very barbaric, uncivilized and cruel. But it is done in the name of the moslem god allah. For the sake of the younger generations of m&ds, I hope you are correct.
In other places, the cut the bloody clit off.
Malays on the other hand, they remove the skin making it even more sensitive.
 

nirvarq

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
When a woman masturbate they rub the top part of the clit. They cut off that part and sew it flat just exactly on the top of the entrance of the female hole. It does not make the Minah less desire to have sex or having an orgasm but the satisfaction factor is lessen much lessen.

Even when having natural sex like normal missionary position our dick and body forms a natural channel pushing the clit direction it's a natural design thingy, perfection.

So when you're having a diluted experience or taste what happen ? You desire it even more because you're just not that deeply satisfied hence circumcision is flawed and very wrong you can't beat nature c'mon .......... lol..........

Same with male circumcision it doesn't make sex better.
 
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