Jingle BUTTS All The Way!!
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Not blue pill.. but laughter's best medicine
- Thread starter yinyang
- Start date
Golf Is Blind.......
Ed and Carolyn met while on a singles cruise and Ed fell head over heels for her.
When they discovered they lived in the same city only a few miles apart Ed was ecstatic. He immediately started asking her out when they got home. Within a couple of weeks, Ed had taken Carolyn to dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, movies, and museums. Ed became convinced that Carolyn was indeed his soul mate and true love. Every date seemed better than the last.
On the one-month anniversary of their first dinner on the cruise ship, Ed took Carolyn to a fine restaurant. While having cocktails and waiting for their salad, Ed said, "I guess you can tell I'm very much in love with you. I'd like a little serious talk before our relationship continues to the next stage.
So, before I get a box out of my jacket and ask you a life changing question, it's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut. I play golf, I read about golf, I watch golf on TV. In short, I eat, sleep, and breathe golf. If that's going to be a problem for us, you'd better say so now!" Carolyn took a deep breath and responded, "Ed, that certainly won't be a problem. I love you as you are and I love golf too; but, since we're being totally honest with each other, you need to know that for the last five years I've been a hooker." Ed said, "I'll bet it's because you're not keeping your wrists straight........
Ed and Carolyn met while on a singles cruise and Ed fell head over heels for her.
When they discovered they lived in the same city only a few miles apart Ed was ecstatic. He immediately started asking her out when they got home. Within a couple of weeks, Ed had taken Carolyn to dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, movies, and museums. Ed became convinced that Carolyn was indeed his soul mate and true love. Every date seemed better than the last.
On the one-month anniversary of their first dinner on the cruise ship, Ed took Carolyn to a fine restaurant. While having cocktails and waiting for their salad, Ed said, "I guess you can tell I'm very much in love with you. I'd like a little serious talk before our relationship continues to the next stage.
So, before I get a box out of my jacket and ask you a life changing question, it's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut. I play golf, I read about golf, I watch golf on TV. In short, I eat, sleep, and breathe golf. If that's going to be a problem for us, you'd better say so now!" Carolyn took a deep breath and responded, "Ed, that certainly won't be a problem. I love you as you are and I love golf too; but, since we're being totally honest with each other, you need to know that for the last five years I've been a hooker." Ed said, "I'll bet it's because you're not keeping your wrists straight........
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A Touching Story
Kind of a cool way to take a casket to the cemetery.
A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery.
Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.
A passer-by remarked, "That guy must have been a very avid fisherman."
"Oh, he still is," remarked one of the mourners.
As a matter of fact, he's headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife."
Kind of a cool way to take a casket to the cemetery.
A funeral procession pulled into a cemetery.
Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.
A passer-by remarked, "That guy must have been a very avid fisherman."
"Oh, he still is," remarked one of the mourners.
As a matter of fact, he's headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife."
THE OLD ENGINE
A 78 yrs old white man who married a beautiful young woman (28 yrs old).
In the hospital when his young wife delivered the first baby...
Doctor: "Congratulations, you got a 3.5 kg baby boy..."
The Old man (smile): "My old engine still work well."
A year later the woman delivered the second baby...
Doctor : "Congratulations, you got a 3.0 kg baby girl..."
The Old Man (still in his big smile) : "Hmmm my old engine is still good !!!"
After 1 and half year later the woman delivered the 3rd baby... still in the same hospital and the same doctor ...
Doctor: "Congratulations, this time is a boy again... only 3.0 kg."
..
"Wow...my old engine still doing good... I can't believe..." said the old white man still in his big smile...
Doctor : "Yes... but i think you better change your engine oil... because this time the baby is black..."
A 78 yrs old white man who married a beautiful young woman (28 yrs old).
In the hospital when his young wife delivered the first baby...
Doctor: "Congratulations, you got a 3.5 kg baby boy..."
The Old man (smile): "My old engine still work well."
A year later the woman delivered the second baby...
Doctor : "Congratulations, you got a 3.0 kg baby girl..."
The Old Man (still in his big smile) : "Hmmm my old engine is still good !!!"
After 1 and half year later the woman delivered the 3rd baby... still in the same hospital and the same doctor ...
Doctor: "Congratulations, this time is a boy again... only 3.0 kg."
..
"Wow...my old engine still doing good... I can't believe..." said the old white man still in his big smile...
Doctor : "Yes... but i think you better change your engine oil... because this time the baby is black..."
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