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Chitchat No Internet Access for Public Servants from May 2017

I remember the 1st time the internet was available in Spore. The dial in service was provided by Pacific Internet
You had pages & pages of regulation you had to agree to.

You face the same red tape when opening a Spore online brokerage or Forex account.

My first internet connection was 28.8kbps over a singtel phoneline. It took 15 min to download a 10MB midi file which basically plays music using keyboard tones. Web designers had to craft pages which load quickly and that meant keeping a tight leash on graphics and plugins.

If at that time someone told me one day i can stream videos and do live conferencing on the Internet i would have laughed him out of the room.
 
See Surf porn on govt computer total ban!!!!

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-36476422

Public servants in Singapore will be blocked from accessing the internet on work computers from May next year.
The moves aims to plug "potential leaks from work e-mails and shared documents amid heightened security threats," the Straits Times newspaper said.
Officials said employees across government would also be barred from forwarding any work-related information to personal emails.
Singaporeans have responded with shock and scepticism online.
Some people thought the move contradicted Singapore's much-promoted Smart Nation technology initiative.
Others thought the suggestion that the measure could also apply to teachers, who do not deal with much sensitive information, was extreme.

***

Teacher Tan Ah Kow: CB lah! Now cannot watch porn while marking papers!

Teach Chow CB: You want porn ah? Come, I charge you SG$10000000000 you open you fly, I open my coffee shop.
 
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Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

hanky panky leads to by election!

PAP almost lost their warts!
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Does this ban go all the way to Perm Secs? Ng How Yue?
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Looks like people have not read the full news. Civil servants can bring their own devices to surf.
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

With wireless Hard Dick Drive, more case of licks like Panama case may happen.
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

SToopid! Mobile is more unsecure than Desktop!

Anyone can sniff the mobile networks!
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

No porn lui must b celebrating now with castration event.
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Something serious must have happened to warrant this.

Public servants spending all their time bitching on SBF?
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Something serious must have happened to warrant this.

Public servants spending all their time bitching on SBF?

more seebil serpents went to sista forum to offer local favors and others filed their field leeport and their monthly progress leeport through dishonest mistake. nevermind move on.
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Hosay liao must be too many civil serpants surfing porn at work kena caught!
 
Re: See Surf porn on govt coumpter total ban!!!!

Our Garmen has low self esteem!

Cannot tolerate different opinions!

Use hackers an excuse to block civil servants access to the TRUTH!

What nonsense is this?
 
IDA is known to be IT illiterate and create more problems in IT than solve it. If they block all USB and wifi transfers as well, it will be great. Also block OCRs and photocopies. Cameras on all personal devices must also be removed. I look forward to their implementation.
 
$2 is a small amount....people here can afford to pay....say $10 come free toilet roll to ease the pain....wanna start a business? Collect all the 300ml or 1.5ml plastic bottles & wash them....set up a counter outside the $10 per trip toilets...sell the bottle for $1 & sell funnels too...

For men - 1 300ml bottle $1, 1.5ml $1.50
For Women - comes with funnel 300 ml bottle $2....1.5m $2.50 already purchased the funnel....same price as men...

woman need the funnel to cover the base to direct the water flow to the bottle....plus wet tissues...$3.50 per set... ha ha ha

This is for emergency in the office....too expensive to go toilet...can hide in pantry, photocopy room, store room etc...& DIY:D

Jamban Jaga Chigger - new biz opportunity for you. Best wishes.
 
IDA's turn trying very hard to look stupid

Transmodified from Mouthpiece CNA hxxp://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/no-internet-access-for/2854528.html

Sex Summary
IDA, CSA donkeys and Yakult learn from the PRC Pandas, North Koreans and Jews that banning the Internet improves cyber security for public service serfs. Own pocket pay for Internet if you are not happy. Teachers and rebellious public service serfs encouraged to explore other career options if they not happy.

PEASANTPORE: Under the guise of guarding against cyber-attacks over the Internet and create a "bogus secure working environment", the work computers of regime serfs will unable to access the Internet.

In a Stalinist style directive to public servants on Tuesday (Jun 7) which Mouthpiece Channel NewsAsia has seen, the Info Donkeys Arses of Peasantpore (IDA) claimed low ranking public service serfs would be encouraged surf the Internet on their own expense and only high ranking lackeys will be provided separate computers or mobile devices.

*Of course cannot make things difficult for IDA, CSA or Yakult bosses. Any idiot will know the White Horses list.

In response to media queries, 'jiat leow bee' IDA said the regime regularly learns from starving North Koreans, stoners Saudi Arabia and maybe the cheap Jews and cums up with cheap but goondu ideas to make the network "less secure".

"After the last cockup in which we crash our own outsourced GDC after Anonymous threaten us, we are made the laughing stock. Our IDA donkeys went to North Korea to study how they ban the Internet. Then the Saudis and Chinks says proxies or firewalls not so effective and the cheap Jews says the cheapest way is to ban Internet. So Yakult says that is a cheap and good idea so we ban internet for our public service serfs lor."

Our donkeys have started to separate Internet access for a biased group of public service serfs. Got MoE teachers 'cry father cry mother', we threaten them with ranking exercise if they made Yakult look stupid.

*It is hard to deny knowing that Yakult has lost "it" for computers but we know he practice Quantum Mechanics as he can be a loyal minion while his spawns have options for dual citizenship.

It is said that certain rebellious ministries are looking into loopholes to quietly challenge IDA donkeys but the changes will be implemented within 12 full moons.

CNA understands that some services, like Gmail, Dropbox and WeTransfer, have already been blocked using cheap proxy servers.

"DEFINITELY A MOVE BACKWARDS"

The Cyber Sex Arses (CSA) said it is working with the new Imperial Technology Arses to carry out their respective functions more inefficiently and less securely.

Said CSA Chief Donkey David Ah-Ko-Koh: "As the Chief Donkey in CSA, I learn from North Koreans and Cheap Jews that banning Internet is cheap and good. You 'cry father, cry mother, got cheaper ideas?"

Ah-Ko-Koh however did not reveal his good grades comes from mugging and he is clueless on IT or Cyber Security. Any cheaper IT guy knows surfing separation will only delay attackers from using malware to access regime computers, Iranian Centrifuge Sabo Fiasco.

"Ai ya, I know its a cock idea lah. But at end of day, I pay the North Korean and Jewish 'con'-sultants to give me a report and I tell that clueless Yakult we better be seem doing something else Ruler Loong will ask what we doing after collecting millions of peanuts annually.

Whether the idea is goondu or halal, you think I care meh? Even I know it is stupid but if I meet KPI enough liao. Those Jane Austen teachers, they kenna more red tape, not my business hor, they not happy, they go comprain to Ya Sor on Sunday, hee hee hee," he said.

Lackey Koh claimed "those Jane Austen rebels who cite this as a move backwards will kenna lighting thrusts from their rears if we manage to identify them".

Separately, a warning was sent out to hush dissent over the new Net access rules. It branded public service serfs who dissent as 'policy challengers' and the Gestapo will hunt down those 内鬼 and gas them till they kowtow to Yakult's directive.
 
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Re: IDA's turn trying very hard to look stupid

Wah. Its a real challenge reading your post. My fault. My engrish need upgrading.
 
My first internet connection was 28.8kbps over a singtel phoneline. It took 15 min to download a 10MB midi file which basically plays music using keyboard tones. Web designers had to craft pages which load quickly and that meant keeping a tight leash on graphics and plugins.

If at that time someone told me one day i can stream videos and do live conferencing on the Internet i would have laughed him out of the room.

If somebody had predicted there will be an annual Pinkdot event I would cum into his arse shoot him head first into a wall....LOL
 
Re: IDA's turn trying very hard to look stupid

they can easily encourage gov workers to go wireless and mobile with gov-issued laptops and tablets by accessing the wi-fi network and 4g lte in-building system if they truly wish for a "smart nation" kind of work environment. they don't need to be stuck at their desks with a wired connection all the time. all they need is to have employees vpn into work servers via ipsec tunnels and encryption to a security gateway with log-in credentials and synchronized/time-stamped rsa soft-tokens before reaching ott applications on work servers (much like sinkpass onekey token). this is how we allow employees in sillycon valley to telecommute and work securely offsite, at customers' location, from home, airport, cafes, anywhere with an open, unsecured wi-fi or 4g connection. the employee work device carries a client that performs dhcp and establishes an fqdn redirect from public isp dns pool to a work dns pool and forces the traffic flow and end points to go through the security gateway. of course, risks of being hacked are always there, but they also exist on highly secured wired networks with supposedly no "back doors" to the internet. back doors are everywhere. even a supposedly "closed" system can be hacked if it has an oa&m port for telemetry and monitoring. target's supposedly firewalled payment system got hacked into as their weakest link was an open 3rd party telemetry system for monitoring and management of their hvac system. the sinkie gov needs to balance productivity with security knowing full well nothing is guaranteed, and with the latest display of ignorance and desperation, it has swung 30 years backwards to 80s style offline work environment. epic fail.
 
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