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Love Story: I came to S'pore to study because Ben was enlisted for NS

UltimaOnline

Alfrescian (InfP)
Generous Asset
Hi, Dana here, found this site after googling my name after realizing my story went on newasia. :/

I just wanted to agree that yes, I have big hips. I completely forgot that all men prefer women with no hips, butts, or boobs! My mistake. :eek: Oh and yeah, there are probably lots of more "chio bu" in Cali than I am... oh well. Plastic surgery can?? :wink:

And I don't have an asian fetish. Like at all. I have no race preference for men. :smile:

Hi Dana,

You're definitely right in that your walking past a "study-abroad table outside the school library" arranged by the University of California--NUS, was a clear sign, arranged by supportive guides & helpers who wish to help further your relationship with Ben.

Glad to know both of you & Ben are doing well together. Happy Valentine's to the both of you. :wink:
 

NoelVermillion

Alfrescian
Loyal
Hi, Dana here, found this site after googling my name after realizing my story went on newasia. :/

I just wanted to agree that yes, I have big hips. I completely forgot that all men prefer women with no hips, butts, or boobs! My mistake. :eek: Oh and yeah, there are probably lots of more "chio bu" in Cali than I am... oh well. Plastic surgery can?? :wink:

And I don't have an asian fetish. Like at all. I have no race preference for men. :smile:
Hi Dana,

I admire your loyalty to your man but are you planning to stay in this island for life?

Just curious.
 

Angelo

Alfrescian
Loyal
Incredible! Asiaone using the article to promote National Service!!

http://www.asiaone.com/News/AsiaOne+News/Singapore/Story/A1Story20110210-262785.html

Thu, Feb 10, 2011
AsiaOne

20110210.122506_ils.jpg


An international love story

When a Singaporean male gives up two precious years of his life for his country during National Service, many a time, the two years is only part of the sacrifice he makes.

With long periods of stay-ins and numerous duties, relationships get strained and girlfriends unable to deal with the stress of being apart often end it for one reason or another.

However, local citizen-journalism site, Stomp revealed a heart-warming story of an American girl who uprooted herself from the comforts of her home to travel to Singapore to be with her love.


Dana, revealed to Stomp that she had first met her boyfriend Ben, in early January 2009 through a prank call that quickly blossomed into a friendship.

By 28 February the very same year they had started dating, however reality about his departure started to set in August when she started university and he remained at home waiting for his enlistment letter.

The physical distance between them started to put a strain in the relationship and Dana contemplated leaving Ben.

"There was one night I seriously began to contemplate breaking up with him, not because I didn't love him, but because I thought it would be best for both of us in the long run and couldn't see any other solution.

"Then the very next day I happened to walk past a study abroad table outside the school library. As it so happens, my school has an excellent study abroad program in Singapore (University of California--NUS).

"Whether you believe in those kind of things or not, I thought that it was a pretty clear sign.

"I made an appointment to see my counsellor the same day. The next thing I had to do was tell all my family and friends that I was going to study abroad in Singapore for a year.

"The most common response was, 'You're going where? Why?' I started to read up on Singapore and apply for some scholarships to make it easier for me to go."

Ben returned to Singapore the following February in 2010, and the chasm that he left behind forced her to study and she managed a 4.0GPA that semester.

He also called her every night during his Basic Military Training(BMT) to talk to her.

When she arrived in Singapore that July she was in for a culture shock.

"When I arrived in Singapore, I was scared and alone, but from the moment Ben picked me up from the airport he has gone above and beyond to look after me.

"Together we've explored all over Singapore. Maybe you've seen us together at the Zoo, Sentosa, Chinatown, Little India, on a bus or MRT, or even at a hawker center eating satay and drinking Milo.

"Ben lives with his grandparents, his aunt and uncle, and cousins, which at first was confusing to me because in the U.S. we generally start to leave home when we turn 18. In Singapore, it seems like dating and family is a package deal.

"Fortunately Ben's family has been incredibly gracious and kind to me, I can't thank them enough.

"They think it's funny that I now love the TV show Ai (from watching it with them so much), and that I wore Chinese dresses for my first Chinese New Year celebrations this year.

"Where we used to live, in the San Francisco-Bay Area, our relationship isn't as much of a big deal because Americans are of all different races, but here we get a lot of stares when we hold hands.

"Ben jokes that someone is going to crash one day because they'll be too busy staring at us walking by, or that someone will put a picture of us on STOMP just because we're an unusual couple.

"Well, I decided that before that happens I would surprise him and be the one to share our story." Dana also admitted that she believes that she has made the right decision to uproot herself for Ben and that she has grown to love Singapore.

" Thanks to him, I've learned so much about Singapore, it's food, it's people, and it's culture, and I even changed my minor to Southeast Asia Studies.

"I'm also very shy, but I started learning Chinese so I could speak to his grandmother.

"Stepping out of my comfort zone has made me a stronger person, but it's not without challenges, and without Ben's support I wouldn't have grown to love him and Singapore as much as I do now. "

Click here to win $1,500 worth of prizes in AsiaOne's Valentine's Day contest

Poor Ben. Lar kopi liao. sigh.
 

hotbot

Alfrescian
Loyal
wahaha...knn, middy, i really like your way of plucking pple...you just made my day.:biggrin::biggrin:

today, one prc-not bad looking, want to sian me in my cab, i can tell she is decent and good girl, told myself dun want to disturb such good woman, she deserve someone better.:o

actually, i will be going to prc, there will be plenty to choose from!hip hip hooray!:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

Benjamin Sim :eek:
 

honeyy

New Member
Hi Dana,

I admire your loyalty to your man but are you planning to stay in this island for life?

Just curious.

Hi NV,

Not at the moment. I'm leaving in May when my Student Pass expires. Might take up an internship in China for a couple months, then swing back through Singapore again in July/August. I'm also only on exchange, so I have to go back and finish school at UC Berkeley (2 years), and then law school (additional 3 years). I've actually grown to like it here but there are some policies/practices wouldn't make it easy for me to live here permanently on my own (at least in the near future). I need to go back home, get my job back (tuition isn't cheap), and finish my education before doing anything else. Also, I don't think I could live my whole life here being judged by my appearance and treated accordingly. It does get kind of tiring after a while. Particularly in San Fransisco, there's a much greater degree of interaction/cohesion between people of different races. As evidenced by some of the replies on this board, even people who've read my story miss the point (FYI, it's about overcoming obstacles, devotion, and loyalty to the person you love) and will still judge me (and him too). No way to win.

On a side note, Ben's immediate family also still lives in California, so I'm sure he'd like to go 'home' too. Not to mention go to a great college, since he has the grades for it.

Thanks for the welcomes. :biggrin:
 
Last edited:

ManBearPig62

Alfrescian
Loyal
Hi NV,

Also, I don't think I could live my whole life here being judged by my appearance and treated accordingly. It does get kind of tiring after a while. Particularly in San Fransisco, there's a much greater degree of interaction/cohesion between people of different races. As evidenced by some of the replies on this board, even people who've read my story miss the point (FYI, it's about overcoming obstacles, devotion, and loyalty to the person you love) and will still judge me (and him too). No way to win.

Welcome to the real world. And the ugly side of the Chinese psyche.

If you are serious about your relationship, better that you experience it now.

Dont mind us here, we're just having fun.
 

NoelVermillion

Alfrescian
Loyal
Hi NV,

Not at the moment. I'm leaving in May when my Student Pass expires. Might take up an internship in China for a couple months, then swing back through Singapore again in July/August. I'm also only on exchange, so I have to go back and finish school at UC Berkeley (2 years), and then law school (additional 3 years). I've actually grown to like it here but there are some policies/practices wouldn't make it easy for me to live here permanently on my own (at least in the near future). I need to go back home, get my job back (tuition isn't cheap), and finish my education before doing anything else. Also, I don't think I could live my whole life here being judged by my appearance and treated accordingly. It does get kind of tiring after a while. Particularly in San Fransisco, there's a much greater degree of interaction/cohesion between people of different races. As evidenced by some of the replies on this board, even people who've read my story miss the point (FYI, it's about overcoming obstacles, devotion, and loyalty to the person you love) and will still judge me (and him too). No way to win.

On a side note, Ben's immediate family also still lives in California, so I'm sure he'd like to go 'home' too. Not to mention go to a great college, since he has the grades for it.

Thanks for the welcomes. :biggrin:

Hi Dana,

I agree that you will get judged here very often. Either you get the minorities who wonder why you are dating a Chinese or some Chinese guys here wondering why you are dating a "nerdy-looking" Chinese. Sometimes you have local women who give you the green eyes. :eek: However, I think this prepares you for your internship in China, where the locals are still having "traditional thinking".

I personally think it will be better for you and Ben to stay in the US after his NS stint unless you do not mind paying exorbitant prices for a pigeon hole, squeezing inside public transport and being unable to afford a car. You and Ben, meanwhile, should be able to use Skype to talk almost every weekends.

You two are smart people, I urge you all to put your future in the States. At least, you will not be thrown aside once you are old. I hope your relationship stays strong.
 

da dick

Alfrescian
Loyal
i don't have a pussy and i won't brag about understanding women, but if i was a pussy , i wouldn't choose a stupid idiot would give up california for sillypore. poor girl. she'll get what she deserves.
 

cooleo

Alfrescian
Loyal
Hi, Dana here, found this site after googling my name after realizing my story went on newasia. :/

I just wanted to agree that yes, I have big hips. I completely forgot that all men prefer women with no hips, butts, or boobs! My mistake. :eek: Oh and yeah, there are probably lots of more "chio bu" in Cali than I am... oh well. Plastic surgery can?? :wink:

And I don't have an asian fetish. Like at all. I have no race preference for men. :smile:

I see that u have made the amateur mistake of paying attention to the bunch of borderline retards here.
 
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