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My family believes in God, but we aren't the kind of people to get up on Sunday mornings and go to church. Personally, I didn't know why attending church was all that important if you already believed in God. So when my best friend invited me to go with her and group of friends to a weekend Youth Camp, I was surprised that I said yes. But she'd been to the same camp before, and said it was really fun. Judging from the group of cool boys who stood waiting for the bus at the "take off spot" I decided it probably was going to be a whole lot of fun. At that point, I was glad I'd said I'd go!
The drive was five hours -- which wasn't all that fun, but we did get to know each other. Then, once we got to the campsite, dinner was waiting for us, served on picnic tables. I was really hungry, so everything tasted good. After dinner, we all went off to "Club." Here we all sat around and sang songs, and then listened to someone read scripture from the Bible. The singing part was fun; personally, I found the scripture reading a bit boring. And scary, too: a camp counselor had said, "This weekend will change your life. When you leave here, you will be a totally different person."
After Club, we went to our cabins. I lay for a long while thinking about the camp counselor's words, "When you leave here, you will be a totally different person." I was worried, because I didn't want to "a totally different person." I wondered what was planned, why wouldn't I be the same again? Plus, I liked who I was, and didn't want to be "totally different". I had ups and downs like everyone else, but otherwise, I was pretty happy. If I did become "totally different," what would I be like? Will my friends still like me; would they accept the "totally different" me? What would my parents think? And, would the "totally different" person (me), want to redo my room; get different clothes; get a new hairstyle; keep the same friends?
What had I gotten myself into?
The next morning we had "Club" again, and after that, were directed to go back to our cabins for what was called "Cabin Time". During this time the head counselor asked each of us questions and we were to answer in front of everyone. I didn't like the exercise; I had to do oral reports in front of the class (and I didn't like to do them). These were strangers, and some of the questions we were asked I didn't think was any of their business.
Some of the other girls must have felt the same, because when Cabin Time was over, we all went for food, and got into a huge food fight. Then, towards the end of the food fight, something peculiar happened to me, something that I still can't really explain. All I know is that it felt as if someone was holding a sign in front of me saying "Believe with all your heart." It was a startling feeling, but tried not to make too much of it. Then, after we ate lunch, we had Club again. Once again, I felt the words, "Believe with all your heart." This time I decided to think about where this was coming from. Had the food fight triggered it? Had smashing oatmeal and other things in other people's faces made me delirious? Or, did I get food poisoning and was hallucinating?
The next morning we had another Club, where two teens gave testimonials of their life faith. Their stories were touching, and left everyone in tears. Me, too. Then, once again we were directed to return to our cabins where we were to write down our feelings about the testimonials we'd heard. I felt like I let every girl and leader in that cabin down because everyone was very emotional about what they'd heard, and though I'd been teary while listening to them, I didn't particularly have any thoughts about them now. "They were very good" I said, and like everyone was looking at me like I was weird or something to not be gushing my heart out over them.
When that exercise was done, we all walked to Town Hall where we talked about everything from boys to why they call cheesecake "cheesecake"-when there is no cheese in cheesecake. And then we talked about Jesus. We talked for two-and-a-half hours. And that night I cried my self to sleep thinking about my life, all the ups and downs, the times when I was so happy, and the times when I am so depressed. Sunday Morning came faster for me than you could say Not Enough Sleep! Sunday we had out last Club. Without prodding from anyone, I openly accepted Christ in my life.
The counselor had been right. The weekend "totally changed" my life.
And I was a totally different person. Like pure magic, it was an instant attitude shift. I was genuinely happy-and a genuinely joyous person. There was the knowing that I didn't have to go through life alone, feeling sadness and depression, feeling insecure about who you are or what your friends think of you. Within me, now, is a serenity and strength that is solid, one I can count on. When you "Believe with all your heart" your heart is lighter, your life is brighter. Things feel less disastrous.
Now as I sit here a year later, I think back. I am so thankful that my friend invited me to Youth Camp, where I was introduced to God in a way I'd never known before, a God who makes it easy to have simple answers to even life's difficult and fuzzy questions. Well, all except "why is cheesecake called cheesecake when there is no cheese in it?"
The drive was five hours -- which wasn't all that fun, but we did get to know each other. Then, once we got to the campsite, dinner was waiting for us, served on picnic tables. I was really hungry, so everything tasted good. After dinner, we all went off to "Club." Here we all sat around and sang songs, and then listened to someone read scripture from the Bible. The singing part was fun; personally, I found the scripture reading a bit boring. And scary, too: a camp counselor had said, "This weekend will change your life. When you leave here, you will be a totally different person."
After Club, we went to our cabins. I lay for a long while thinking about the camp counselor's words, "When you leave here, you will be a totally different person." I was worried, because I didn't want to "a totally different person." I wondered what was planned, why wouldn't I be the same again? Plus, I liked who I was, and didn't want to be "totally different". I had ups and downs like everyone else, but otherwise, I was pretty happy. If I did become "totally different," what would I be like? Will my friends still like me; would they accept the "totally different" me? What would my parents think? And, would the "totally different" person (me), want to redo my room; get different clothes; get a new hairstyle; keep the same friends?
What had I gotten myself into?
The next morning we had "Club" again, and after that, were directed to go back to our cabins for what was called "Cabin Time". During this time the head counselor asked each of us questions and we were to answer in front of everyone. I didn't like the exercise; I had to do oral reports in front of the class (and I didn't like to do them). These were strangers, and some of the questions we were asked I didn't think was any of their business.
Some of the other girls must have felt the same, because when Cabin Time was over, we all went for food, and got into a huge food fight. Then, towards the end of the food fight, something peculiar happened to me, something that I still can't really explain. All I know is that it felt as if someone was holding a sign in front of me saying "Believe with all your heart." It was a startling feeling, but tried not to make too much of it. Then, after we ate lunch, we had Club again. Once again, I felt the words, "Believe with all your heart." This time I decided to think about where this was coming from. Had the food fight triggered it? Had smashing oatmeal and other things in other people's faces made me delirious? Or, did I get food poisoning and was hallucinating?
The next morning we had another Club, where two teens gave testimonials of their life faith. Their stories were touching, and left everyone in tears. Me, too. Then, once again we were directed to return to our cabins where we were to write down our feelings about the testimonials we'd heard. I felt like I let every girl and leader in that cabin down because everyone was very emotional about what they'd heard, and though I'd been teary while listening to them, I didn't particularly have any thoughts about them now. "They were very good" I said, and like everyone was looking at me like I was weird or something to not be gushing my heart out over them.
When that exercise was done, we all walked to Town Hall where we talked about everything from boys to why they call cheesecake "cheesecake"-when there is no cheese in cheesecake. And then we talked about Jesus. We talked for two-and-a-half hours. And that night I cried my self to sleep thinking about my life, all the ups and downs, the times when I was so happy, and the times when I am so depressed. Sunday Morning came faster for me than you could say Not Enough Sleep! Sunday we had out last Club. Without prodding from anyone, I openly accepted Christ in my life.
The counselor had been right. The weekend "totally changed" my life.
And I was a totally different person. Like pure magic, it was an instant attitude shift. I was genuinely happy-and a genuinely joyous person. There was the knowing that I didn't have to go through life alone, feeling sadness and depression, feeling insecure about who you are or what your friends think of you. Within me, now, is a serenity and strength that is solid, one I can count on. When you "Believe with all your heart" your heart is lighter, your life is brighter. Things feel less disastrous.
Now as I sit here a year later, I think back. I am so thankful that my friend invited me to Youth Camp, where I was introduced to God in a way I'd never known before, a God who makes it easy to have simple answers to even life's difficult and fuzzy questions. Well, all except "why is cheesecake called cheesecake when there is no cheese in it?"