Willynn Ng, 37, is a single mum of four : Dealing with divorce and infidelity was painful, but here’s why I still believe in love

[batman1]

Another 奶爸

Heavy burden.No joke. 555

 

[Narong Wongwan]

No one wants 4 kids from 2 different fathers in tow

 

[bobby]

Unless she has child support payment in a lump sum from the father of the 4 chewren…good luck to her and her future husband too.

Happy weekend chewren custody & sharing

 

[Aaron carter]

Still can't win this Joyce who got fucked by three different men and had a kid with each:

Singapore Teen Mums: Raising 3 Kids Who Have Different Fathers

https://www.domainofexperts.com/2018/05/singapore-teen-mums-raising-3-kids-who.html

 

[Pinkieslut]

Just another slut pretending to be angel

 

[searcher1]

 

[oliverlee]

Which guy would settle for a loose cunt and 7 mouths to feed?

 

[jurongkechil]

Which guy would settle for a loose cunt and 7 mouths to feed?

Rich man...

 

[Robert Half]

No decent good man will give a cent to such a woman

 

[Hightech88]

She is a real MILF slut. Dating her nao!!!

 

[cockie]

This is the type of mother I love.

Or those if mother I would love to fuck Aka MILF?

 

[syed putra]

No decent good man will give a cent to such a woman

You go find a virgin if you can get. Impossible. Some schoolmate got to them before 0 level.

 

[Robert Half]

You go find a virgin if you can get. Impossible. Some schoolmate got to them before 0 level.

There are so many women in this world .. it is so stupid to find such a piece of furthermore you are expected to spend & give them money

Sinkie old men are instead very stupid

 

[red amoeba]

the name says it all, she is Willing (Willynn) what are you guys waiting for?

 

[shock888]

Dealing with divorce and infidelity was painful, but here’s why I still believe in love​

Ms Willynn Ng, a divorcee with four children, shares what she has learnt from marriage, divorce and infidelity, as well as how she is putting herself back out there in the dating scene.

Growing up, Ms Willynn Ng (pictured) was raised to believe that love follows a "structured path". (Photo: CNA/Ooi Boon Keong)

Willynn Ng
14 Feb 2025 09:30PM (Updated: 15 Feb 2025 08:47AM)

Growing up as the oldest of four children in a traditional Singaporean family, I was raised with the belief that love follows a structured path: Graduate from university, get engaged, apply for a Build-to-Order (BTO) flat together, settle down and live happily ever after.

My parents, being old-fashioned, had hoped that I would follow this route, but life had a different plan for me.

Now, divorced at 37 with four kids and two fur kids, I sometimes wonder how my life would have turned out if I had done things differently.

At 21 years old, I got married to my childhood friend, who was eight years older and from the same religious community. He was my second love – my first had been the typical secondary school puppy love, sweet and sentimental but ultimately insubstantial.

My new husband was the youngest in his family, with a big age gap between him and his two older siblings, and the pressure to settle down intensified especially when his father was pre-diagnosed with cancer when we were dating.

The expectation was clear: Get married and start a family while his father was still around.

At the time, the age difference between my husband and I was what many people might today call a “red flag”. Not that I wasn’t aware of this, but I naively thought that this generation gap could be closed by the love we shared.

Some people told me that marrying an older man meant that he would be more doting and I bought into that belief.

Besides, I was young. Having known him all my life, being with him was comfortable. Since we had been dating for three years and our families knew each other, marriage felt like the right next step.

CRACKS SHOWING​

Having grown up in a big and loving family, I had always wanted to start a big family of my own. Back then, I thought I had found the ideal love to fulfil this wish – with someone I had chosen, not an arranged marriage like in my parents’ generation.

I became a mother at 22. While my peers were enjoying university life and partying on Fridays and Saturdays, I was learning how to keep a tiny human alive.

With my parents and in-laws’ support, we secured a BTO flat in the same estate while our family grew, welcoming three kids in consecutive years.

Thankfully, my father-in-law got to be part of his grandchildren’s early years before he died.

I felt like I’d gotten everything I wanted in life: A good husband, a cosy home, adorable kids that brought me so much joy, all bolstered by extended family support.

Soon, though, cracks began to appear.

Ms Willynn Ng in a 2012 photo. Here, at age 24, she was already a mother of two children. (Photo: Willynn Ng)
The age difference between my ex-husband and me became more apparent, especially when it comes to parenting our children.

He was raised to prioritise academics; I believed in passion, creativity and arts above all. We couldn’t seem to stop disagreeing on everything – what primary schools our kids should attend, for instance.

Over time, we could no longer see eye to eye, leading to an amicable split.

I became a solo parent of three young children – and I wasn’t even 30 yet.

Looking back, one regret we both had was not prioritising our relationship and we focused more on securing a good livelihood. We worked hard to provide for our children, but our marriage suffered. However, the experience made me stronger and more independent.

I was more concerned for my children than myself, but surprisingly, they handled the divorce well.

Of course, we had long conversations with them about it, making sure they understood that we loved them no matter what and that they had absolutely nothing to do with our split.

I think this is what helped them to understand that divorce was the best option for everyone in order to create a more positive, loving environment for them in particular.

I also saw this as an opportunity to challenge the myth that children from single-parent families are destined to struggle.

I placed a high priority on building and shaping my kids’ characters. For instance, I took great pains to make sure they have good manners, so they would never have to hear stigmatising comments attributing their behaviour to their parents’ separation.

ANOTHER LOVE, ANOTHER HEARTBREAK​

After the divorce, my views on love changed drastically. Practicality took precedence over materialistic or romantic ideals. The saying "It’s easy to love, but hard to live together" resonated deeply with me.

I entered into a new relationship with a long-time friend and that went well for a time. Having known each other for so long, we just seemed to make sense as a couple. We even planned for a child together without marriage.

Ms Willynn Ng in a 2018 photo with her first three children while pregnant with her fourth child. (Photo: Willynn Ng)
I thought he was my endgame. Then, during the seven years we were together, he cheated on me – twice. The second time, it was over.

At first, I couldn’t get over my anger at his cheating. After I forgave his first trespass, how could he betray my trust yet again?

I did doubt myself for a bit (maybe I hadn’t done enough to meet his needs?), but after some hard self-reflection, I realised that there is simply no excuse to cheat, let alone to do so repeatedly.

Because I’d known him for so long, I’d assumed that I knew all of him, that he couldn’t break my trust.

It was a hard pill to swallow, but I had to confront and acknowledge my own blind spots.

LESSONS ON LOVE AND LIFE​

If I could go back in time now, would I still pick this path, knowing where it would lead?

Despite my regrets, I can’t say I wouldn’t. After all, this path gave me my children, whom I love dearly.

Instead of regrets, I’m choosing to focus instead on the invaluable lessons I’ve learnt on this rocky road.

Last year, I took on a new role to spearhead the launch of TanTan Tribe, a new dating application that focuses on compatibility and authenticity.

One of my favourite features on the app is for users to identify their own red flags and the ones they refuse to tolerate in potential partners.

This has made me reflect on the decisions and choices I’ve made in my past relationships. I feel that I understand people’s and my own differing ideas and views on love and relationships a lot better now.

Some people may see my past relationships as failures, but they taught me so much about how I want to love and be loved.

They also showed me that everyone is flawed, but it is ultimately up to us what flaws we are willing to tolerate in our relationships with others.

I used to believe in a fairytale happily-ever-after, not understanding the immense effort required to sustain a relationship beyond a dream wedding.

When it came to love and romance, I had been stuck in my comfort zone; I had always chosen long-term relationships with partners I had already known for years.

I thought I had a specific "type" of partner I had to be drawn to – but over the years, I find myself appreciating and valuing inner peace and open communication over superficial compatibility.

Instead of living out a picture-perfect dream or fantasy, I understand now that true love should be about nurturing each other, having fun and growing together.

Through it all, I learnt to be kinder to myself and to prioritise self-love before seeking love from others.
Ms Willynn Ng (pictured) said that her past relationships taught her so much about how she wants to love and be loved. (Photo: CNA/Ooi Boon Keong)
Society often stigmatises divorcees and single parents, but I refuse to see myself as a failure.

Being (newly) single (again) at 37 doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with me.

Mistakes and letdowns don’t mean that I’m “undateable” or unlovable – they just mean that I’m human.

I want to be a living example of this for my friends who are in the same boat but, more importantly, for my daughters.

Today, I’ve managed to maintain good relationships with both my exes. It may sound strange, but I do feel our bonds are now stronger as co-parents and most importantly, friends.

If I could give one piece of advice to my younger self, I’d say: Take your time, enjoy the process and don’t rush.

Love isn’t about checking off milestones. It’s about two people communicating honestly, striving to understand each other and growing together.

Right now, I’m embracing the journey, meeting new people in real life and online, and enjoying the process of getting to know others beyond what can be listed on a piece of paper or profile.

Above all, I have hope that, just maybe, a “happily ever after” is still in the cards for me.

Willynn Ng, 37, is a single mum of four. She is also chief tribe and regional head of TanTan Tribe, the international version of TanTan, an Asian dating app.

Any Samsters interested here? Marry one get 4 kids free.

 

[eatshitndie]

willynn still willing to try a willie at 36.9? will be wailing again.

 

[Hypocrite-The]

Which guy would settle for a loose cunt and 7 mouths to feed?

m&ds like Syed and ang mors...to ang mors...Asians are exotic

 

[syed putra]

m&ds like Syed and ang mors...to ang mors...Asians are exotic

Hey! Normally the women will feed me.

 

[Sinkiesuk]

Very fertile type. That means always wet and horny.

Prc chickens mostly milf and gave birth before and they are wild and wet.

 

[k1976]