Jana Hocking: ‘Straight’ men are using dating apps to hook up with other men
ByJana Hocking, News.com.au
The other day I was at dinner with my favorite gay husband aka ‘gusband’ and we were halfway through a bottle of red, so of course, the conversation quickly delved into my favorite topic: our sex lives.
As I am basically a nun at the moment sigh, my friend’s update was far more interesting. He revealed that he’s currently sleeping with a straight guy.
Umm … excuse me what? Yep, turns out they met on a gay dating app called Scruff and the guy is in a straight relationship, but likes to venture further afield every now and then.
Now as someone who subscribes to the belief that there is no such thing as gay or straight, rather than sexuality sits on a spectrum and is far more complex than a simple black-and-white answer, I’m always a little bit chuffed when I hear about people who are brave enough to explore their sexuality.
A close friend of Jana Hocking told her that he was sleeping with a ‘straight’ man. Instagram/Jana HockingI mean, sure, it’s not great that the bloke is kinda cheating, but that aside, I think there’s no harm in trying on new hats to see what they like when it comes to sex. (Obviously within healthy boundaries).
When I asked if there were many ‘straight‘ men on Scruff, he said “Oh yes, heaps!” I ventured further and asked how many ‘straight’ guys he’s slept with and after a little pondering he said, “Oh about ten”.
T-E-N!
He went further and said that most of them had wives or girlfriends, but they were just super curious, and it was fairly common for him and his friends to hook up with guyswho called themselves straight.
According to Hocking’s friend, men met on a gay dating app called Scruff, and often enough there are straight men in relationships on the app. Getty ImagesI decided to delve deeper and asked more gay friends if this was common practice and it was a 100 percent YES!
One gay friend even revealed he loves the chase when it comes to hooking up with a straight guy. Almost like it’s a fun game to play. Huh!
It reminded me of a message I got in my DMs when I hosted a ‘Tell me a saucy secret’ night on my Instagram.
One guy wrote, “I watch gay porn and changed my Tinder to match with blokes so I can send d–k pics because it turns me on. I’ve never been with a guy before though.”
One friend revealed he loves the chase when it comes to hooking up with a straight guy.Getty Images
Another said that most of the men had wives or girlfriends, but they were just super curious about being with another man.Getty Images
It makes me ponder whether we will ever reach a stage where people are no longer judged for their sexuality. Just when you think we’ve come so far, you once again hear about someone being pushed back further into the closet.
So, is there really any need for labels anymore? Do they just confine and constrict us?
I remember once, in my early 20s, doing the unmentionable – yes, I went through my ex-boyfriend’s phone … I know tsk tsk – but it revealed some very flirty messages with another guy.
I decided to gently confront him about it. It hurt knowing he was semi-kinda-cheating on me, but what hurt more was the idea that he might be gay and too afraid to come out.
So I took him to a bar, ordered two shots of tequila, and said, “Drink this, and then I’m going to ask you a question.”
Jana Hocking believes that there’s no harm in trying on new hats to see what men like when it comes to sex.Instagram/Jana HockingHe did as told, and with a bit of tequila-bravado I simply asked him straight “So … do you think you might be gay?’
I quickly added, “I honestly don’t mind if you are, I just want you to be happy, and please know I would never judge you.”
At first, he looked shocked, and then broke down in tears and revealed that yes he think he might be. It was a beautiful cathartic moment, and something, years and years later we now laugh about.
So I think the lesson here is if you can leave judgment at the door, a robust and curious sex/love life can be a glorious thing. If only we gave people the respect and space to explore.
Source:https://nypost.com/2022/11/17/jana-...utm_source=NYPTwitter&utm_campaign=SocialFlow
