Bro, do keep your chin up. I felt the same too when my dad, the sole breadwinner died leaving a pile of debts for me to clear (not that he intended it) when I was still a young man. Being the eldest in the family, I hv to sort things out emotionally and financially for the family. With 2 sisters ,1 brother and a housewife mom to take care, I felt really lost for direction. I gave up schooling and started working life early. Till today I'm stlll slogging. I survived. You can do it too. My deep condolences!