My dad has been self-radicalising every night with extreme pro-China/anti-non-China propaganda videos. Anyone experienced similar behaviour? What should I do?
I write this from a point of fear and exasperation. My life at home revolves around avoiding and fearing my dad. But in the last year or so he has gained a new habit that scares and triggers me.
Every night (and every morning + afternoon since WFH started), he plays a series of videos about China. They are usually either videos with robot voices, or videos with a human talking angrily.
The views and content I've heard from these videos include:
- China is a lion, that is only sleeping right now
- The islands in the South China sea are China's, because China got them first in a past dynasty. All other countries opposing China are flawed, barbaric, have violent histories, etc. and they should be ashamed; or they used to be under the barbaric rule of the west, and so should side with China instead
- Back when the Hong Kong courts overturned the mask ban last year, one video said about the judges involved: "Foreigners are not Chinese, they don't have Chinese blood, that's why they don't care about China"
- If I don't pay attention, all I hear is 中国的 (China's) and 美国的 (America's) on loop
All this began when our Chinese TV channels started showing mainly shows from China, and removed most shows from Taiwan. He got interested in watching those shows online, and got steadily into angrier-sounding videos via recommendations. Now every day and night I'm bombarded with anti-US videos with strident robotic voices, and my dad has been making increasingly extreme and hostile comments, like:
- Spouting conspiracy theories about SARS and COVID being a western weapon targeting Asian races, and when Germans first got infected he said "cannot be leh"
- Using "angmoh" as an actual slur against any European/Australian/American white people
- Gloating that more angmohs are dying from COVID, meaning they are inferior to the Chinese
- Joking about invading the US because they seem weak right now
My mum is gradually being influenced too (she also gloated about the COVID deaths). I'm a major pacifist so all this makes me struggle to live peacefully at home.
I think that this behaviour is self-radicalisation, no less harmful than the kind promoting ISIS/terrorism that got people in trouble with ISA. Has anyone else observed those around them getting similarly radicalised? And does anyone know what I can do about it? I have been frantically searching for a suitable de-radicalisation video/article to drop into the family group chat, but most content I find discussing biased or rage-inducing media is US/UK-centric. Any suggestions would be appreciated!
Note: In case it's not obvious, I am neither pro- nor anti- China.
Second note: Can y'all not downvote comments unless they're really irrelevant? I'm not looking for an echo chamber. I'm willing to hear the other side as long as they're not ads or trolls.
...............
Edit: Adding more anecdotes as I remember them. Plus more context in response to the comments here:
- My dad is tech-savvy (he worked in tech for many decades). His devices are controlled by him.
- He's English-educated, in the best stream in his time, which was Engineering. But he's not educated in other areas like critical thinking, as he thinks anything non-science is arty-farty nonsense.
- He was pro-Trump not long ago. And I think my parents occasionally watch Dr Oz
- My dad has been to China with my mum, twice in the past year. I think they go to see scenic mountains.
- To explain the fear I mentioned: My dad rules our family in an authoritarian way. Depending on his mood, sometimes no disagreements, opinions, or "likes and dislikes" are allowed. You never know what you might do or say to trigger his anger, violence and insults. Things have improved since everyone has gone grey-rock on him except my mum.
- Second reason for fear: He's turned a lot more racist, and has a slur for any major race here + angmohs. He is also a voter. Can you imagine if an anti-"west" pro-war party appears in the next few terms?
- I think some of the videos are from Whatsapp as well
What I'm trying:
- My preferred way to take action is non-confrontational, so I'd be most grateful for any links I can drop into my family group chat! Like this one
- I have read about deep canvassing as a good method to reduce prejudice, and am trying out the ideas (non-judgmental listening, sharing more personal stories, nudging towards reflection)
...............
One day later:
Thank you everyone for your comments, suggestions and stories! I've learnt some new things here and will continue reading through all of these.
I've concluded sadly that my observation is not uncommon, and also not the most extreme. I see that others are also struggling with inter-generational conflict. I might find time later to compile a list of good resources and ideas here.
