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Thinking Aloud ...

glockman said:
I absolutely agree, can eat, eat!. And to quote a wise black woman from the US, "ain't no valley low enough, ain't no river wide enough."
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hanor, even the bible has something on "kui jit-tiow lor" for his journey on the well-travelled road to hunt for 2-legged maams with big mammaries :whistling:
"Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.
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yinyang said:
Looked fine from our (voyeur's?) perspective, to be honest. Her assertiveness was not only exclusive work-wise.
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eatshitndie said:
hopefully ahmeng did not misspeak and meant her bed manners as her actual "work".:ninja:
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yinyang said:
Nah, he knows his place -even in the thick of action (oops, excuse the bad pun).

Talk about mixing work with pleasure.
Go, go Tarzan.. don't leave your Jane on the ropes
Click to expand...

"Jane" is a driven career woman. She knew what she wanted from me. I gave her what she had wanted. It was a straightforward transactional barter trade of physical and emotional needs. When the "transaction" ended, we lead our separate lives, with good and pleasant memories of our adventurous spirits. Lol :D
 
"In our hearts, we all have secrets that no one else can see. It can be about money, career, love, lust, sex, "illicit" relationships, dysfunctional family members. When you go on social media and read what your friends, colleagues or acquaintances are posting, you should never feel like you are missing out on something in your life, be it delicious food pictures, beautiful holiday shoots or even those lovely proclaiming words and pictures, of supposed truism on love, wisdom or inspirational quotes.

You are "reading" them based on their "external" facing social media posts, and in all probabilities, you do not realy know what's going in their "internal" lives and minds. Don't compare what you know of yourself "internally" with what's your friends are posting on the "external" dimension. Their lives and thoughts might even be worse than yours, struggling to make ends meet, or they are in an unhappy relationship which they are never going to publicly put on their social media front".

Ah Meng (April 2019)​

Above is a short summary of what I told the "chiobu" from [XXBankXX]. She is an Executive Relationship Manager whom I met, when I was in Hong Kong a couple of weeks ago. She had asked to meet me to sign some documents and I offered to buy her lunch. No ulterior motives on my part. She's is in early 30s. Pretty face. Big eyes. Fair complexion. Perfect gym toned body. Proportionate size "door knobs", underneath her professional looking, off-white translucent long sleeve ribbon blouse.

God knows why they call themselves "Relationship" manager. Sounds awfully trampy (at least for me). After getting the official business out of the way, we were chatting candidly about life and career. She started comparing herself with her peers, colleagues, friends and telling me that she's probably "behind" them in her career and love life. She showed me some social media posts of her "successful" friends with much envy. She sounded a wee bit "insecure" in her life to date.

Hence my (above) advice for her.

Hopefully it has helped her in her thoughts, though I am getting "a little worried". She has been WhatsApping me intermittently. This morning, she messaged, informing me that she will be in Singapore for a short work trip cum holiday. She asked if I am available for dinner. I have readily agreed to meet up. My spirit was weaker than my flesh, at that moment when I replied her. My licentious thoughts vividly reminded me of her off-white translucent long sleeve ribbon blouse.

SS18WRB064A_NU_00.jpg


Translucent silky ribbon blouses (like the one above) do get me "triggered" when they are homogenized with my lucid carnal imagination of "pulling the ribbon".

I guess she's probably only seeing my "external" side, and not knowing my "internal" animalistic qualities.
 
I am going to write about something sad tonight.

A few years ago, I received a WhatsApp message from a mutual university friend. She informed me that my ex-girlfriend, a junior from University days, was probably not going to make it past that night. She had Stage 2 breast cancer. She had gone for chemotherapy, immunotherapy, etc. The remission period was only a year. Unfortunately, the aggressive cells had returned. By then, it had become Stage 4. It had spread to her other core organs. Having not met her for a few decades, I mustered my courage to Mount Elizabeth. As I walked along the hospital corridors to her room, memories of our tumultuous relationship in university days flooded my muddled thoughts. Good, Bad, Bad and Ugly.

Good, because she was a generous and kind girl, always giving in to my selfishness, pranks, nonsense and nuisance.

Bad, because I was a bastard, not treasuring her love for me at that time. No excuses, but perhaps, I just did not know how to love, and what was "love" at that young age.

Bad, because after me, she had a couple of failed relationships, and finally divorced. She had since remained single. I hope I wasn't the catalyst.

Ugly, because she ran me down with her father's Mercedes-Benz when I told her "It's over". I opened the car door, and walked away from her car, and the next thing I knew, was being flung many metres across a traffic junction. I was hospitalized for a week, but I did not file a police report or complaint. Though in total shock and excruciating pain, I recalled telling the ambulance officer and ER doctor that it was solely my own fault, as I had crossed the road without looking. Thankfully in those days, there weren't any road cams or car cams to contradict my "evidence". My parents, who flew over on hearing my "accident", had their suspicions after speaking to her. I persisted in my lies, to protect her from any legal or university disciplinary dilemmas. Probably, I felt guilty, for ending the relationship. I reckoned that it was my parting "gift" to her. Or maybe, I was still very much in love with her, not wanting her to get into trouble and screwing up her future life, by having a criminal record.

Fast forward, as I stepped into her hospital room... She was lying on the bed with tubes, bags, machines and respirator. She was in a very much less than semi-conscious state. I held on to her hands. I could feel she was aware of my presence, despite not having met for many years. I spoke to her. Her chest was heaving heavily. Her eyes were in a trance like state, unable to open or close fully. Her eyeballs were almost nonexistent as I could only see white. I could sense that she wanted to say something to me. It pained (and still pains) my heart to see (remember) her in such an absolutely devastating state. Before I left, I told her not fight anymore. It was simply pointless. And its just too painful for all those who had cared for her, to see her resisting the finality. The next day, she left. I guess she's in heaven, and a happier soul now. I hope she isn't laughing at me, still finding my way around in this messy world of women, lust and love.

I also promise myself ∼ when my final day of reckoning arrives, I will not fight, but smile myself away.
 
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[Source :https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/...hy-some-people-see-ghosts-and-other-presences]

Why Some People See Ghosts and Other Presences

www.psychologytoday.com
shutterstock_125332187.jpg
Source: Lario Tus/Shutterstock

In the 2013 science-fiction thriller Gravity, Sandra Bullock plays an astronaut who gets stranded in a capsule in space following a catastrophe in which she is the apparent lone survivor. Cold, frightened, and alone, she resigns herself to her fate and shuts down the cabin's oxygen supply to commit suicide. As she begins to lose consciousness, she is visited (or is she?) by her fellow astronaut, played by George Clooney, whom she believed to be dead. He gives her a pep talk and a survival plan—and then he leaves. She eventually realizes that Clooney’s visit did not really happen, but the experience still gives her the strength to continue on. By following "his" plan, she is able to survive what seemed to be a hopeless situation.

The movie was science fiction, but the encounter that Bullock’s character has with a "being" who appears in a moment of desperation is a human experience far more common than you might think. Psychologists refer to it as the “sensed presence.”

The "Sensed Presence"

The sensed presence usually happens to individuals who have become isolated in an extreme or unusual environment, often when high levels of stress are involved. These individuals report a perception or feeling that another person is there to help them cope with a hazardous situation. The vividness of the presence can range from a vague feeling of being watched to a clearly perceived, seemingly flesh-and-blood entity such as Clooney’s character in Gravity. This entity might be a god, a spirit, an ancestor, or someone personally known to the observer. Sensed presences usually appear in environments with little variation in physical and social stimulation; low temperature is also a common ingredient.

Possible explanations for a sensed presence include the motion of boats, atmospheric or geomagnetic activity, and altered sensations and states of consciousness induced by changes in brain chemistry triggered by stress, lack of oxygen, monotonous stimulation, or a buildup of hormones. There is in fact exciting new evidence from a research group led by Olaf Blanke demonstrating that it is the precise stimulation of specific brain regions that tricks people into feeling the "presence" of a ghostly apparition.

Environmental psychologist Peter Suedfeld also thinks that what we do cognitively changes under these circumstances and may play a role.

Suedfeld proposed that we normally spend most of our time attending to and processing external, ambient stimuli from the physical world surrounding us. However, persistent exposure to stimuli that we are evolutionarily unprepared to process, or a lack of change in our surroundings, may cause us to focus more withinourselves, which most of us are much less experienced at doing.

We Have "Agency-Detection" Mechanisms

creepy_ghost_brushes_by_linzee777.jpg

Seeing ghosts may also be triggered by the “agency-detection mechanisms" proposed by evolutionary psychologists. These mechanisms evolved to protect us from harm at the hands of predators and enemies.

If you are walking down a dark city street and hear the sound of something moving in a dark alley, you will respond with a heightened level of arousal and sharply focused attention and behave as if there is a willful “agent” present who is about to do you harm. If it turns out to be just a gust of wind or a stray cat, you lose little by overreacting, but if you fail to activate the alarm response and a true threat is present, the cost of your miscalculation could be high. Thus, we evolved to err on the side of detecting threats in such ambiguous situations.

A recent study by Kirsten Barnes and Nicholas Gibson (2013) explored the differences between individuals who have never had a paranormal experience and those who have. They confirmed that experiences of supernatural phenomena are most likely to occur in threatening or ambiguous environments, and they also found that those who had paranormal experiences scored higher on scales measuring empathy and a tendency to become deeply absorbed in one’s own subjective experience.

Most likely, the experience of the sensed presence is the result of many of these factors interacting at once.

When Do Sensed Presences Occur?

Some of the most compelling descriptions of sensed presences come from lone sailors who have experienced hallucinations and out-of-body experiences. In one famous incident, Joshua Slocum, the first person to circumnavigate the globe single-handedly, swore that he saw and spoke with the pilot of Columbus’s ship the Pinta. He claimed that the pilot steered his boat through heavy weather as Slocum lay ill with food poisoning.

Many other startling, vivid examples of such apparitions reported by sailors, mountain climbers, and polar explorers are described in a 1987 article by Suedfeld and Mocellin. These include recurring reports by polar explorers that they felt as if someone was following them on their treks; Mt. Everest climbers stranded in snow holes hallucinating rescuers; and survivors of sinking ships counting extra persons in their lifeboats.

Although sensed presences are most frequently reported by people in weird or dangerous places, it is not unreasonable to assume that such experiences can happen in more mundane surroundings.

For example, grieving individuals who have lost a loved one on whom they depended greatly may shut themselves off from social contact with others and rarely leave their homes. The lonelinessand isolation, coupled with high levels of stress and unchanging sensory stimulation, might very well produce the same biological conditions that could trigger a “visit” from the recently departed. Studies indicate that almost half of widowed elderly Americans experience a hallucination of the departed spouse. Such after-death communications actually appear to be a healthy coping mechanism and a normal part of the bereavement process.

The phenomenon of the sensed presence may account for some religious experiences as well. Such episodes often occur following extended periods of meditation and internal reflection and may be facilitated by unusual and intense physical stimulation. Early religious figures such as Moses, Jesus, and Mohammed all reportedly met supernatural beings while wandering in the desert; indeed, fasting, prolonged meditation, and stimulation of the body through pain and fatigue are part and parcel of most religions.

Rites of Passage

Many societies feature a period of isolation and unusual environmental stimulation as a rite of passage from adolescenceto adulthood. The transcendental altering of consciousness may be an important part of such experiences, as well as physical hardship or even torture. In such rituals, sometimes referred to as vision quests or spirit quests, seekers hope to encounter a spirit or being that will provide them with guidance and advice. In some Native American tribes, a young man would receive his adult name from such a being during his vision quest. These spirit quests involve solitude in harsh environments or intense sensory bombardment—drumming, sweating, chanting, or dancing—in a confined area. Both approaches to the quest have included starvation, thirst, and sleeplessness as means of further altering arousal levels and conjuring an encounter with a spirit.

The sensed presence is a very real, perceptual experience for those individuals who have experienced it, and it can be very hard to convince them that it was anything other than what they believe it to be. When evaluating self-reports from individuals who have had an extraordinary experience, ranging from an alien abduction to a visit from a supernatural being, it may be difficult to know how to proceed.
There are really only three possibilities:
  1. The event really happened, just as the person has reported.
  2. The person truly believes that the event has happened, but it has not.
  3. The person is fabricating a story for some reason.
The best we can do under the circumstances is to evaluate the relative probability of each of these options and choose the one that appears most likely.
 
When I was young, I could experience "Sensed Presence" (See article from Psychology Today ∼ Post 412 ∼https://www.sammyboy.com/threads/thinking-aloud.268233/page-21#post-2909496). However, by the time I was in 9 years old, for good or for bad, I lost my "abilities" completely. I have always been looking for answers, be it in religions or science, to explain my (then childhood) "abilities". It has been for a few decades now. Nothing has proven conclusive.

Some of my "Sensed Presence" events include:

1. No one is at home except me. I saw the tap in my bathroom turning on and off by itself after discharging water.
2. A couple of times when I am alone in my bedroom, with my dog, my room lights would go bonkers flickering away, My dog would start to bark at something which I couldn't see at all.
3. In school, I got to know a "new friend" from another class during recess, but I never see him again. My other friend cum neighbour from the other class told me there wasn't such a person in his class the next day.
4. A sweet motherly looking lady, often smiling and waving at me, at my bedroom window, at night. This happened a couple of times.

There are more, but I shouldn't elaborate. I certainly do not wish to frighten anyone, who could be reading this post in the middle of the night now.

I wasn't afraid at that age. I just wondered why? I did inform my parents, who subsequently brought me to see a psychiatrist, She diagnosed me as having some neurotic disorder.

A couple of months after seeing the psychiatrist, somehow, I totally lost my "Sensed Presence" abilities. It never came back again. I doubt it ever will.

Psychology Today in their article outlined three possibilities:

1. The event really happened, just as the person has reported.
2. The person truly believes that the event has happened, but it has not.
3. The person is fabricating a story for some reason.

I am still debating whether it's 1 or 2. At times, I think it's 1. Sometimes, I feel it's 2.

My eyelids are scumbling to gravity now. Good night.
 
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AhMeng said:
When I was young, I could experience "Sensed Presence" (See article from Psychology Today ∼ Post 412 ∼https://www.sammyboy.com/threads/thinking-aloud.268233/page-21#post-2909496). However, by the time I was in 9 years old, for good or for bad, I lost my "abilities" completely. I have always been looking for answers, be it in religions or science, to explain my (then childhood) "abilities". It has been for a few decades now. Nothing has proven conclusive.

Some of my "Sensed Presence" events include:

1. No one is at home except me. I saw the tap in my bathroom turning on and off by itself after discharging water.
2. A couple of times when I am alone in my bedroom, with my dog, my room lights would go bonkers flickering away, My dog would start to bark at something which I couldn't see at all.
3. In school, I got to know a "new friend" from another class during recess, but I never see him again. My other friend cum neighbour from the other class told me there wasn't such a person in his class the next day.
4. A sweet motherly looking lady, often smiling and waving at me, at my bedroom window, at night. This happened a couple of times.

There are more, but I shouldn't elaborate. I certainly do not wish to frighten anyone, who could be reading this post in the middle of the night now.

I wasn't afraid at that age. I just wondered why? I did inform my parents, who subsequently brought me to see a psychiatrist, She diagnosed me as having some neurotic disorder.

A couple of months after seeing the psychiatrist, somehow, I totally lost my "Sensed Presence" abilities. It never came back again. I doubt it ever will.

Psychology Today in their article outlined three possibilities:

1. The event really happened, just as the person has reported.
2. The person truly believes that the event has happened, but it has not.
3. The person is fabricating a story for some reason.

I am still debating whether it's 1 or 2. At times, I think it's 1. Sometimes, I feel it's 2.

My eyelids are scumbling to gravity now. Good night.
Click to expand...
:eek::eek::eek:
dcbe622dc027aaef12a09f1a7db77ecd.jpg
 
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