Singapore jokes - progress package etc

[counsel]

Responding to the government call to have more kids, 40 year old Tan Seng Kee went to the doctor for a sperm count check.

The doctor gave Tan Seng Kee a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."

The next day Tan Seng Kee reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and Tan Seng Kee said, "Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.

Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing. We even called up Fiona, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing.

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" Tan Seng Kee replied, "Yep, none of us could get the jar open"

 

[counsel]

Meanwhile, Tan Seng Kee's wife was helping Tan Seng Kee set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, she told him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he could remember
easily and will use each time he has to log on.

Tan Seng Kee was feeling horny and he want to make his wife shiok so when the computer asked Tan Seng Kee to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife what he was keying in....

P... E... N... I... S

Tan Seng Kee's wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied: PASSWORD REJECTED . NOT LONG ENOUGH.

 

[vamjok]

clap clap clap, the first one is good!!

 

[tommy]

Ha ha ha ha good jokes