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Not blue pill.. but laughter's best medicine
- Thread starter yinyang
- Start date
How to handle women at different ages:
8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68 & 78....
8 - U take her to bed & tell her a story.
18 - U tell her a story & take her to bed.
28 - U Don't have to tell her a story to take her to bed.
38 - She tells u a story & takes u to bed
48 - She tells U a story to avoid going to bed.
58 - U stay in bed to avoid her story.
68 - If u take her to bed, that will be a story
78 - If u take her to bed, that's the end of the story!
8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68 & 78....
8 - U take her to bed & tell her a story.
18 - U tell her a story & take her to bed.
28 - U Don't have to tell her a story to take her to bed.
38 - She tells u a story & takes u to bed
48 - She tells U a story to avoid going to bed.
58 - U stay in bed to avoid her story.
68 - If u take her to bed, that will be a story
78 - If u take her to bed, that's the end of the story!
Arguing over a girl's bust size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Carlsberg and Budweiser. Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
Having a cold drink on a hot day with a few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks.......PRICELESS!
Old Couple Making Out?
A old married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife had curled up ready to go to sleep and the husband put his bed lamp on to read a book. As he was reading, he paused and reached over to his wife and started fondling her vagina.
He did this only for a very short while, and then he would stop and resume reading his book. The wife gradually became aroused with this, and thought that her husband was seeking some response as encouragement before going any further.
She got up and started stripping in front of him.
The husband was confused and asked “What are you doing taking your clothes off?”
The wife replied, “You were playing with my pussy. I thought it was foreplay to stimulate making love with you tonight.”
The husband said, “No, not at all.”
The wife then asked, “Well, what the hell were you doing then?”
“I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book!”
A Bar Opened Opposite a Church!!!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning & caught fire which destroyed it.
Bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
"It's Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer & an Entire Church that Doesn't Believe in it"
A old married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife had curled up ready to go to sleep and the husband put his bed lamp on to read a book. As he was reading, he paused and reached over to his wife and started fondling her vagina.
He did this only for a very short while, and then he would stop and resume reading his book. The wife gradually became aroused with this, and thought that her husband was seeking some response as encouragement before going any further.
She got up and started stripping in front of him.
The husband was confused and asked “What are you doing taking your clothes off?”
The wife replied, “You were playing with my pussy. I thought it was foreplay to stimulate making love with you tonight.”
The husband said, “No, not at all.”
The wife then asked, “Well, what the hell were you doing then?”
“I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book!”
A Bar Opened Opposite a Church!!!
The Church Prayed Daily against the bar business.
Days later the bar was struck by lightning & caught fire which destroyed it.
Bar Owner Sued the Church Authorities for the cause of its destruction, as it was an action because of their Prayer.
The Church Denied all Responsibility!!!
So, the judge commented,
"It's Difficult to Decide the Case because here we have a Bar Owner Who Believes in the Power of Prayer & an Entire Church that Doesn't Believe in it"
Life's a sperm?
Today is Sperm Appreciation Day
Today, lets have a Moment of Silence in Honour of those children who were not born But were......
1. Swallowed during a Blow job,
2. Thrown away in a Condom,
3. Washed in trousers during Masturbation,
4. Dropped on someones breast and died in
tissue paper,
5. Slipped on someones hips and lost with
water..
6. Suffocated in the darkness of some arseholes (male and female),
7. Died in the orifice of goats, cows and camels (especially in the Middle East)..
8. And many more untold incidents. ...
Consider Yourself very lucky to be alive. Coz You made it!
You are a Sperm That Survived!!
You were the fastest swimmer and you made it!!
You were a Sperm that survived while billions of others Perished.
So do not feel down. Live Life and Enjoy Life. If you made it when you were a Sperm... You can make it in Life too!
Today is Sperm Appreciation Day
Today, lets have a Moment of Silence in Honour of those children who were not born But were......
1. Swallowed during a Blow job,
2. Thrown away in a Condom,
3. Washed in trousers during Masturbation,
4. Dropped on someones breast and died in
tissue paper,
5. Slipped on someones hips and lost with
water..
6. Suffocated in the darkness of some arseholes (male and female),
7. Died in the orifice of goats, cows and camels (especially in the Middle East)..
8. And many more untold incidents. ...
Consider Yourself very lucky to be alive. Coz You made it!
You are a Sperm That Survived!!
You were the fastest swimmer and you made it!!
You were a Sperm that survived while billions of others Perished.
So do not feel down. Live Life and Enjoy Life. If you made it when you were a Sperm... You can make it in Life too!
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?'
'Not yet,' she replied
'Not yet,' she replied
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