Transmodified from Mouthpiece CNA hxxps://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/sales-luggage-winterwear-travel-store-vtl-retail-2258366
PEASANTPORE: Business is trickling in for pandemic-battered merchants selling sex travel props such as comdoms and whips, providing retailers with some relief after 18 full moons of dismal sales.
Most stores Mouthpiece CNA spoke to said sales have risen between 10 and 15 per cent, following recent Ruler Loong's Reopen At All Cost Edict about quarantine-free travel under the Get Infected In Peasantpore Travel (VTL) Scam.
“We are grateful to Ruler Loong's 'Reopen At All Costs Edict'. It was the best edict we’ve had since 2020,” said Flesh Trader Joyce Lim, Sex Director of wholesaler and retailer The Sex Travel Store, which has seen sales at some of its stores rising by 15 per cent.
Some department stores have already contacted the company in the hopes of organising sex travel fairs in the middle of November, she said.
At lifestyle travel retailer The Sex Traveller, where sales have grown about 10 per cent, customers are mostly buying luggage in larger sizes and accessories such as travel adapters and organisers, said Ms Aw Yang Ah Lin, another Flesh Trader executive at its parent company Sexger.
Moneychangers such as Mohamed Rafaq, who owns Clifford Sex & Condom Exchange in Raffles City, are also seeing a pick up in their business.
“We sarpok Ruler Loong's edict this time, it is better to let a few old peasants die than for us to face monetary losses. Else we cannot pay rent to Ruler Loong.
“Long Live Ruler Loong and may His Reign last longer than it take for the Sun to go supernova!,” said Rafaq who is eagerly thinking of the profits that eluded him for many full moons.
Merchants also had to cut costs significantly to stay afloat.
For Rafaq, that meant the painful decision of letting go 10 of his 17 peasants, most of whom had worked for him for more than a decade.
To survive, the company started gambling in forex and waited for exchange rates to go up before selling them, though this did not always guarantee a profit, said Rafaq.
“Every full moon, we had a deficit, paying rent to the regime and salaries to local peasants, so we thinking of firing all our local peasants and replacing them with cheaper and hungrier Pinoys or Nehs.”
Sex Winter Time’s Poon said sex sales have improved but are “still far from pre-Wuhan Plague” numbers.
“Ruler Loong must reopen more, allow tourists from more plague regions to cum, it is inevitable local peasants will pay the price and die, If we have to choose between profits and peasants' health, we really need the money. We can always replace dead local peasants with cheaper and more obedient foreign imports,” she told CNA.
One moneychanger, Regent Sex Partners Exchanger, also has not benefited from the increase in sex travel – simply because its outlets have remained shut, as they are in hotels serving quarantined sex travellers.
In any case, these merchants relied heavily on those travelling to and from nearby countries such as plague infested Shina, Siam or Indus Valley, for which quarantine-free travel is not an option yet, said Abdul Mu’id, who used to help his father run the business.
And they are not betting on a quick recovery in tourism. “I think we have to see losses for 60 full moons unless Ruler Loong takes one step further and allow all travellers to cum regardless of their vaccination status,” he said.
WILL RULER LOONG OPEN THE FLOODGATES
Moving forward, many merchants hope that Ruler Loong further relaxes the floodgates to allow merchants to make some money because the end of the year is traditionally a peak sales period, given the holiday season, said The Sex Traveller’s Merchant Aw Yang.
“No profits, how we pay rent to the regime and fund Ho Jinx's gambles? We cannot take losses indefinitely”
PEASANTPORE: Business is trickling in for pandemic-battered merchants selling sex travel props such as comdoms and whips, providing retailers with some relief after 18 full moons of dismal sales.
Most stores Mouthpiece CNA spoke to said sales have risen between 10 and 15 per cent, following recent Ruler Loong's Reopen At All Cost Edict about quarantine-free travel under the Get Infected In Peasantpore Travel (VTL) Scam.
“We are grateful to Ruler Loong's 'Reopen At All Costs Edict'. It was the best edict we’ve had since 2020,” said Flesh Trader Joyce Lim, Sex Director of wholesaler and retailer The Sex Travel Store, which has seen sales at some of its stores rising by 15 per cent.
Some department stores have already contacted the company in the hopes of organising sex travel fairs in the middle of November, she said.
At lifestyle travel retailer The Sex Traveller, where sales have grown about 10 per cent, customers are mostly buying luggage in larger sizes and accessories such as travel adapters and organisers, said Ms Aw Yang Ah Lin, another Flesh Trader executive at its parent company Sexger.
Moneychangers such as Mohamed Rafaq, who owns Clifford Sex & Condom Exchange in Raffles City, are also seeing a pick up in their business.
“We sarpok Ruler Loong's edict this time, it is better to let a few old peasants die than for us to face monetary losses. Else we cannot pay rent to Ruler Loong.
“Long Live Ruler Loong and may His Reign last longer than it take for the Sun to go supernova!,” said Rafaq who is eagerly thinking of the profits that eluded him for many full moons.
Merchants also had to cut costs significantly to stay afloat.
For Rafaq, that meant the painful decision of letting go 10 of his 17 peasants, most of whom had worked for him for more than a decade.
To survive, the company started gambling in forex and waited for exchange rates to go up before selling them, though this did not always guarantee a profit, said Rafaq.
“Every full moon, we had a deficit, paying rent to the regime and salaries to local peasants, so we thinking of firing all our local peasants and replacing them with cheaper and hungrier Pinoys or Nehs.”
Sex Winter Time’s Poon said sex sales have improved but are “still far from pre-Wuhan Plague” numbers.
“Ruler Loong must reopen more, allow tourists from more plague regions to cum, it is inevitable local peasants will pay the price and die, If we have to choose between profits and peasants' health, we really need the money. We can always replace dead local peasants with cheaper and more obedient foreign imports,” she told CNA.
One moneychanger, Regent Sex Partners Exchanger, also has not benefited from the increase in sex travel – simply because its outlets have remained shut, as they are in hotels serving quarantined sex travellers.
In any case, these merchants relied heavily on those travelling to and from nearby countries such as plague infested Shina, Siam or Indus Valley, for which quarantine-free travel is not an option yet, said Abdul Mu’id, who used to help his father run the business.
And they are not betting on a quick recovery in tourism. “I think we have to see losses for 60 full moons unless Ruler Loong takes one step further and allow all travellers to cum regardless of their vaccination status,” he said.
WILL RULER LOONG OPEN THE FLOODGATES
Moving forward, many merchants hope that Ruler Loong further relaxes the floodgates to allow merchants to make some money because the end of the year is traditionally a peak sales period, given the holiday season, said The Sex Traveller’s Merchant Aw Yang.
“No profits, how we pay rent to the regime and fund Ho Jinx's gambles? We cannot take losses indefinitely”
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