There is violence in wars, which involves the entire nation in defending itself from aggressors. Thus a need to ensure that war is the last resort when all diplomatic efforts fail. There will be deaths from both sides -combatants & from collateral damage. It will be a finality when the victor wins & the loser abide by the terms of defeat.
However, the discussion here is about DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, violence between individuals occurring in a domestic setting. In your case, it is about defending yourself by violence. caused by non physical actions from another - words, stares, etc.
Should you want finality to it - doing it thoroughly - it would mean killing the abuser, as he too will fight back. Count to 10, & think of the CONSEQUENCES, before you launch the punch or the stab - you will be hunted down, arrested & spend the rest of your life in prison on capital charge.
Even if violence is done in half past 6 fashion, whereby the victim is injured, you will be arrested & will spend the next 10 yrs in prison, lost your freedom, over a moment's anger. Is it worth it?
There are better ways to resolve differences in domestic settings than to resolve thru violence, & as you are a Christian - "Vengeance is MINE, says the LORD."