Inclusiveness: Body Positivity

[LITTLEREDDOT]

"Activists say that there is increasing receptivity towards body positivity in Singapore, even though Western advocates and influencers may have led the charge."

Sorry dear, not Dot.
Good for you if you are positive about your fat body and can accept it.
But fat is fat, and people will call you fat.
Since you have learnt to embrace and accept your body, you should also be positive and accept being called fat.

Enjoy...
Body positivity movement grows in Singapore

Activists say that there is increasing receptivity towards body positivity in Singapore.
ST PHOTOS: ONG WEE JIN, YONG LI XUAN, KHALID BABA

Venessa Lee

MAR 27, 2021


SINGAPORE - The body positivity movement is growing in Singapore, inspired by the likes of plus-size celebrities such as global music superstar Lizzo, as well as local activists.

Body positivity, a social media buzzword in recent times, encourages attitudes of affirmation and acceptance towards one's body, especially if it is plus-size.
Generations have been inundated with idealised images of slender women in the mass media and society.

Men, too, have increasingly been subjected to pressure regarding their appearance, observers say.

Activists say that there is increasing receptivity towards body positivity in Singapore, even though Western advocates and influencers may have led the charge.

Body positivity activist Aarti Olivia Dubey, 39, says: "The amount of body shaming seems to have decreased, with more people wanting to understand what body positivity is about. Singapore seems to be catching up, though the movement here is not moving as fast as it could."

Ms Chow Li Ying, founder of Our Bralette Club, a local lingerie business that uses "real people" of different shapes and sizes, instead of professional models, for their publicity materials, says: "I think the body positivity movement is growing, especially in the past two years or so, based on our market research."

More retail brands are offering both larger and smaller sizes, alongside the standard ranges available, though they typically start with more plus sizes initially, she says.
However, shifting societal norms when it comes to body image remains elusive.

Tokyo Olympics creative chief Hiroshi Sasaki recently resigned after suggesting that a female body positivity activist could appear as an "Olympig" in the ceremony. He said plus-size comedienne Naomi Watanabe could wear pig ears at the opening ceremony.

Ms Dubey says: "What this incident says is that fat shaming is still one of the most acceptable prejudices.

"On the other hand, more people are speaking up against it, which signifies that there is more of an awareness and understanding now of why fat shaming is hurtful."

Ms Carrie Sim, 31, a sales and marketing manager who wears clothes in UK size 14, often posts body-positive photographs of herself on her Instagram account, and has worked with gymwear brands to promote body acceptance.

She says it is no surprise that Instagram and other social media have driven change in such attitudes, with women of all sizes posting photos of themselves, as well as their thoughts about body image.

She says: "Women in general have a lot more control over their own narratives now."

Here are the stories of four women.

 

[LITTLEREDDOT]

"Ms Aarti Olivia Dubey, 39, is not bothered about how she looks in photographs."

You go girl! So you should also not be bothered if people said you are fat.

Troll this body positivity activist and she will embrace her body even more

Ms Aarti Olivia Dubey says she is done with trying to conform to societal ideals of how a woman should look.S
T PHOTO: GIN TAY

Venessa Lee

MAR 27, 2021

SINGAPORE - Ms Aarti Olivia Dubey, 39, is not bothered about how she looks in photographs.

"The word 'flattering' does not matter to me," says the full-time body positivity activist during a photo shoot with The Sunday Times.

After decades of struggling with her body image, as well as two miscarriages, medical conditions, depression and disability, Ms Dubey says she is done with trying to conform to societal ideals of how a woman should look.

In 2011, she launched a blog called Curves Become Her, where she writes about body positivity and social issues such as feminism. These days, she posts most of her content on her Instagram account @curvesbecomeher, where she has more than 30,000 followers.

The former mental health therapist, who is married to a 46-year-old special needs teacher, says: "I think women are so confined to society's rules and beauty standards that anything out of the ordinary is considered an aberration.

"We have normalised body shaming. It is so strange that as a way of greeting, people say you have gained weight or you have lost weight."

From the age of 11, Ms Dubey, who had been a skinny child till then, "went down the rabbit hole of eating disorders" like anorexia and bulimia, losing weight - and being praised for it - but never permanently.

"How people looked at me changed, even as a child. It changed from being friendly to almost hostile, feeling that a child who is chubby is lazy, slovenly or is stuffing herself with food - all the assumptions that come with being big. I ended up internalising a lot of it," she says.

The year she got married at age 27, she was eating crackers for breakfast and protein shakes for lunch and dinner.

Although she sometimes fainted from hunger during daily workout sessions with a personal trainer, she did not look like the paper-thin brides in magazines that her relatives had pressured her to become.

She has asthma and PCOS or polycystic ovary syndrome, a condition with an increased risk of infertility and obesity. She also has mobility issues and is unable to stand or walk for too long.

By the end of her 20s, following her pregnancy losses, she had become withdrawn and anxious. She was self-harming and covering the mirrors at home to avoid looking at herself.

Things came to a head when she was taking stock of her life on a milestone birthday.

"I felt old when I turned 30, I felt exhausted. I had lived a life with so much restrictions and self-loathing. I was really tired of pleasing everyone except myself. I wanted to know what a life filled with self-acceptance would look like," she recounts.

Around that time, devastated by the death of an aunt who had been close to her, she sought therapy and took anti-depressants.

Ms Aarti Olivia Dubey's includes speaking at webinars and collaborating with brands for greater awareness on the topic.
ST PHOTO: GIN TAY

"I wanted to leave behind a life where I had helped someone in the process," she says.

Following American plus-size influencers and models who looked happy and confident on social media, such as Gabi Gregg and Tess Holliday, opened her mind up, she says.

In 2011, Ms Dubey started Curves Become Her, a satirical nod to one of her favourite movies, Death Becomes Her (1992), a film about the obsession with youthful beauty.

Her activist work includes speaking at webinars and collaborating with brands for greater awareness on the topic.

But there is a long road ahead to bring about change, she says, probably a "lifelong" journey.

In blogging about fashion, for instance, she is up against the pervasive pressures women face to be pretty. "Despite the fact that we were parroting acceptance, we were still pigeon-holing ourselves as plus-size women, where you constantly doll yourself up, you are well-dressed and you wear heels."

Even while she preaches self-acceptance, she is not accepted by many. She is trolled daily by online commentators, who hiss that she looks like she is about to have a heart attack, whenever she posts footage of herself on Instagram.

But she channels her anger at her online bullies productively, she says, by embracing herself even more.

Several years ago, she posted her first photo of herself in a bikini, feeling "amazing". Before, even posting a photo of herself in a one-piece swimsuit terrified her.
She scorns accusations of "glorifying obesity", a common reaction on the Internet to images of plus-size women.

"When you're a fat person, there are a lot of armchair physicians. My standard response is that if I'm glorifying anything, I'm glorifying people's rights to live and let live," she says, adding that weight and appearance are not necessarily indicators of good health. She also speaks out against other forms of discrimination and racism.

Practising mindfulness helps. Describing herself as a spiritual person who does not subscribe to a particular faith, she has found solace in the teachings of famed Vietnamese Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh, who teaches mindfulness.

"He talked a lot about how to use mindfulness to first centre ourselves. We need to centre ourselves when we are activists. It's been very grounding to follow his teachings in my activism," she says.

 

[LITTLEREDDOT]

It is possible to keep the weight down if one makes the effort to do the right exercise and watch one's eating.

Social movement founder now chases performance, not weight loss or goals

Ms Cheryl Tay went through a similar phase of over-exercising and under-eating when she was 18.
ST PHOTO: ONG WEE JIN

Venessa Lee

MAR 27, 2021

SINGAPORE - Ms Cheryl Tay, 34, used to hate her body, though she has always been sporty and slim.

At her heaviest, she weighed 68kg. At 1.67m tall, her body mass index was 24.4, putting her at moderate risk for obesity-related diseases.

The founder of Rock The Naked Truth (rockthenakedtruth.com), a movement that aims to improve body image, was a university student in her early 20s then.

Comparing herself to lissom celebrities and peers, and not feeling pretty or skinny enough, she spent $20,000 on slimming pills and products and practised hot yoga obsessively, eventually reaching her target weight of 50kg.

A few years earlier, when she was 18, she went through a similar phase of over-exercising and under-eating.

Despite being outdoorsy and a member of the track and field team in her junior college, she was called names like "Cheryl Piggy Tay".

She laughed along, mocking herself in self-defence against further teasing.

But she started to run 20km in the morning and another 6km in the evening for three months, sometimes throwing in kickboxing classes in between.

Her periods stopped as her weight plummeted.

She weighed herself constantly, even after drinking half a glass of water, noting with dismay the resulting 200g "weight gain".

Eventually, she hit a nadir of 43kg, but it accompanied a spiral of bingeing, starving and self-harm, where she would scratch herself till she bled.

However much weight she lost, it never seemed enough and she always gained most of it back.

Ms Tay, now a freelance digital content creator and fitness trainer, says: "I thought I only wanted to lose 5kg, but losing weight was addictive. Even after losing more than 20kg, I was still not satisfied.

"I am 60kg now, but I have come to realise it is not about the weight. My struggles with my body had affected my whole life."

She launched Rock The Naked Truth in 2016 after discovering another way of looking at her body when a friend introduced her to weight-lifting. She began competing in Ironman triathlons after that.

Ms Cheryl Tay launched Rock The Naked Truth in 2016 after discovering another way of looking at her body when a friend introduced her to weight-lifting.
ST PHOTO: ONG WEE JIN

"I saw how the body is capable of doing so much more than you think. I started to chase performance goals, rather than weight-loss goals," she says.

Ms Tay, who is in a relationship, founded the social movement "to remind people that they, and their bodies, are enough".

She works with fashion and fitness brands, multinational organisations and schools to spread awareness about body positivity and to motivate people to find confidence through fitness. Rock The Naked Truth recently collaborated on an Instagram campaign with Our Bralette Club, a local lingerie business that promotes embracing bodies of all shapes, sizes and colours.

"Rock The Naked Truth has helped me grow as a person. I'm now willing to work on my flaws, and my relationships with family and friends have improved," she says.
In the past, her insecurities about her appearance led her to stay in toxic relationships, she adds.

Now, she is so at ease with her body that she does nude photo shoots. Taken in 2018 and last year, the photographs, where some body parts are strategically covered, were posted on Instagram, where she has more than 42,000 followers.

Ms Tay says: "They were done in a classy way and people were largely supportive, though I got some hate comments.

"I wasn't doing it to show off. I was trying to use the photos to represent my beliefs. It's a celebration of how comfortable I am in my body."

 

[LITTLEREDDOT]

Fat shamed as a child, make-up became her therapy

Ms Mary Victor works with swimsuit, skincare and other retail brands to promote campaigns that show all kinds of "normal" bodies.
ST PHOTO: YONG LI XUAN

Venessa Lee

MAR 27, 2021

SINGAPORE - Once an advocate, make-up artist Mary Victor, 24, has since distanced herself from the body positivity movement.

In 2019, when she was 22, she launched #thebodywithin on Instagram as a social media movement, kicking off with a conceptual photography series, where she wore a dress made of aluminium, symbolising a metallic shield.

Now, besides posting her own content, she works with swimsuit, skincare and other retail brands to promote campaigns that show all kinds of "normal" bodies.

"Having flabby arms, stretch marks, dark skin or acne is so normal. In Asia, though, the pressure is to be fair and skinny," she says.

She says the rah-rah of the body positivity movement - which broadly advocates that everyone deserves to have a positive body image, regardless of what society and popular culture views as ideal - has soured for her.

"Thinking that you should love yourself could lead you to have a toxic mindset and put aside realistic feelings, when sometimes, you just don't feel good," she says, adding that she has also been turned off by claims that body positivity promotes obesity.

Instead, she now subscribes to body neutrality, where one simply accepts one's body and appreciates how it works, rather than focusing on what it looks like and feeling pressured to "love" it.

She was forced to live out her own thinking about body neutrality after an episode of sciatica about a year ago.

Carrying her dog, a medium-sized mongrel which was wriggling to break free from her arms, triggered pain to the sciatic nerve in the lower back and she was bedridden for a week.

"For a while, I couldn't run or jump, or even climb the stairs much. I had to slowly accept that this was happening to my body."

These days, she practises body neutrality by eating instinctively, having plenty of vegetables when she feels like it, and not panicking when she wants a scoop of ice cream.

How she feels today is a far cry from her childhood, when she was taunted for being bigger than her peers and developed disordered eating as a result. She remained plus-size, with her weight shifting only about 4kg despite much effort to slim down.

From age nine, she dealt with bullying on account of her size and racial slurs because of her dark skin.

As a teen, she starved herself, purging the sole curry puff she sometimes ate in a day. She hit herself to feel "relief" from her pain. She suffered breathing difficulties during panic attacks and took too many flu pills a few times, hoping for oblivion.

Ms Mary Victor now subscribes to body neutrality, where one simply accepts one's body and appreciates how it works.
ST PHOTO: YONG LI XUAN

After Secondary 4, she did not want to study further as her schoolmates-cum-tormentors would likely go to the same school she was eligible for.

Instead, she took up a diploma course in professional make-up and never looked back.

"It healed me a lot. Make-up became my therapy. I could make other people feel good about themselves and their appearance, even though I had never felt that," says Ms Victor, who is in a relationship.

"I receive a lot of messages from older women and from girls, some as young as eight, who feel insecure about their body. They say they feel better after coming across my movement. That is why I keep going," she says.

 

[LITTLEREDDOT]

Dressing plus-size women in Singapore to strut with confidence

Ms Xindy Ng opened her first brick-and-mortar store which stocks garments from UK sizes 14 to 22.
ST PHOTO: ONG WEE JIN

Venessa Lee

MAR 27, 2021

SINGAPORE - Ms Xindy Ng's love of fashion has long been thwarted by the difficulty in finding beautiful, plus-size outfits for her UK size 22 frame.
Ms Ng, 29, recalls trying on her mother's "fancy clothes" - a tweed jacket, pink dress and high heels - as a child.

But growing up, she had to make do with frumpy, loose-fitting "market clothes" which her mum brought her to the wet market stall to buy. They made the teenager feel about 30.

For her prom night in Secondary 4, she spent months searching for the perfect ensemble - alas, in vain.

She ended up with a stretchy, black and white cotton dress that felt "makeshift", and walked awkwardly in UK size 9 shoes, which pinched her UK size 11 feet, as it was too difficult to find footwear in Singapore that fit her.

After a poor showing at the O levels, she worked for a few years in office and retail jobs. She squeezed in as much travel as she could before she did a diploma and, later, a degree in business studies in her 20s.

She discovered a thriving plus-size market in Bangkok, where the clothes fit her better than bulkier American plus-size options that were more widely available in Singapore.

In 2013, at the age of 21, she founded a blogshop selling plus-size clothes, Love.PrettyPlus+, modelling the dresses she brought in from suppliers from Thailand and China, and posting the photos online.

In September last year, she opened her first brick-and-mortar store in Chinatown, which stocks garments from UK sizes 14 to 22.

Ms Ng says: "I always wanted to have a plus-size boutique of my own. Everybody's shape should be accepted and you should love your body, regardless of your size."

While she has not always been comfortable in her own skin, she sees her business as a means to help women feel better about their own bodies.

Always "the biggest kid" in her extended family, she was a large baby, weighing 4.2kg at birth.

Enduring TAF Club, the now-defunct Trim and Fit programme for overweight schoolchildren, was punishment enough, she says.

She felt helpless in the face of mockery when she was called a "feizhu" (fat pig in Mandarin), until a Primary 3 classmate told off her bullies.

"That made me feel more confident. Other people may find it hard to accept me because of my size, but I've always had a small, supportive circle of friends," she says.

Ms Xindy Ng opened her first brick-and-mortar store in Chinatown in September last year.
ST PHOTO: ONG WEE JIN

She fully accepted her size only after a failed diet she undertook at the age of 13, at her family's urging.

Eating an apple for dinner each day left her hungry.

"I lost 10kg that year, but I put it back in six months. I guess I accepted my body size then, when I was 14. I thought, why don't I accept my body shape and make myself happier? I tried to make myself look better in other ways."

She started experimenting with curling her hair, collecting a diverse range of earrings and learning about make-up from YouTube.

Now, she advises other women to make "little differences" to feel better about their appearance.

Mr Raymond Ng, 29, a friend from secondary school, has been taking photographs for her business for years.

"I've tried to help her follow her dream. Let's not be judgmental as a society. Fat women can be beautiful too," he says.

Three years ago, he became a fellow director in Love.PrettyPlus+ and the pair are in a relationship.

Ms Ng often encounters customers who dress only in dark colours to hide their bulk or who have given birth and feel bad about their post-partum bodies.

"For me, it's not just a business, it's the interactions with customers that I also value," she says.

"Some of them tell me it's pointless to dress up, that they wear only bermudas and T-shirts and they really want to cover up their whole body. They may leave with a few new clothes. But when they visit the next time, they're all dressed up, which makes me very happy."

 

[zhihau]

Are we having an oil shortage crisis?

 

[Leongsam]

Why can't they eat less, lose weight and they won't have to pretend to be positive despite looking like beached whales.

 

[KuanTi01]

Many are actually tam chiak ji ending up obese and blaming others for body=shaming them.

 

[Cottonmouth]

These pigs are top choices if we are choosing meat to BBQ.

 

[nightsafari]

Socialist/Cancel/Woke.

Race to the bottom.

 

[nightsafari]

These pigs are top choices if we are choosing meat to BBQ.

you prefer gas or charcoal?

 

[Cottonmouth]

you prefer gas or charcoal?

 

[laksaboy]

Libtard foolishness is taking root in Sinkieland among the millennials. Inclusiveness, political correctness, gender neutral, lower carbon footprint, no plastic straws and other assorted nonsense. You are seeing it happen now.

People hate to get feelings hurt, so they shun the truth and bullshit themselves. Sad!