- Joined
- Jul 22, 2013
- Messages
- 11,413
- Points
- 113
Baggage. Whenever people ask me why I am still single, I would say I am just not actively looking. That might be true to a certain extent but there might be a greater underlying reason. Since my ex of a 2-year relationship left me 3 years ago, I feel that I have never been the same before. From my point of view, we were really happily in the relationship when she suddenly told me she no longer had feelings for me. And then, she left my life completely by moving abroad. She was the one I loved the most, could ever imagine a future with and when it happened, I really broke.
For the next 2 years, I could not let go and the memories of her and I never fails to flood my imaginations and dreams. Now on the 3rd year post-mortem, I feel that I have finally sort of moved on ( no more dreams) but I feel that remains of that incident is still haunting me. I used to be a chill and trusting partner in relationships. However, after experiencing being told by a partner that she no longer loves me out of the blue, I no longer have the confidence of myself as a partner. I no longer have the sense of security with the people I am dating and find myself doubting their commitment to me. You might say I should have seen it coming (her losing feelings) in the relationship but I unfortunately 100% did not. I detest this feeling and the person I am today. I have dated a fair bit recently but feel like I have been unable to make past the dating phase because of this psychological hurdle. Sometimes I wonder if I am still not ready for a relationship or will I ever be.
For the next 2 years, I could not let go and the memories of her and I never fails to flood my imaginations and dreams. Now on the 3rd year post-mortem, I feel that I have finally sort of moved on ( no more dreams) but I feel that remains of that incident is still haunting me. I used to be a chill and trusting partner in relationships. However, after experiencing being told by a partner that she no longer loves me out of the blue, I no longer have the confidence of myself as a partner. I no longer have the sense of security with the people I am dating and find myself doubting their commitment to me. You might say I should have seen it coming (her losing feelings) in the relationship but I unfortunately 100% did not. I detest this feeling and the person I am today. I have dated a fair bit recently but feel like I have been unable to make past the dating phase because of this psychological hurdle. Sometimes I wonder if I am still not ready for a relationship or will I ever be.
