My new GF says I have E.D. yesterday.
Now in MRT otw to office, I am reflecting on her unkind assessment of my condition.
To be honest, I am afraid to put on weight. Every morning, after disposing my waste liquids and semi solids in the toilet, and before consuming anything else, I would weigh myself without fail.
If I put on 1 kg or more, I would be in some sort of mental and emotional panic.
I am about 179 to 181 cm (depending on whether its morning or night) and my weight hovers around 70kg to 70.xxkg. My BMI is thus around 21 to 22.
So when my weight hits 71kg, I would get uptight, sometimes to the point of upset.
I would stare at the mirror after my shower, use my mobile to take pictures of my fatty body. I would also (sort of) get depressed and eat minimally the whole day. For example, a banana for breakfast, an apple for lunch and a simple bun from the nearby bakery for dinner.
If by the next morning my weight doesn't drop back to 70kg, I would continue my "eat minimal strategy" until I hit 70kg the following morning (or repeat next and next and next day until my weight hits around 69 to 70kg).
My new GF thinks I am crazy adopting such a draconian strategy.
I don't think so. I don't want to put on weight and adversely affect my a.fibrilation condition too.
Am I crazy?
Do I really have a Eating Disorder issue?
Now in MRT otw to office, I am reflecting on her unkind assessment of my condition.
To be honest, I am afraid to put on weight. Every morning, after disposing my waste liquids and semi solids in the toilet, and before consuming anything else, I would weigh myself without fail.
If I put on 1 kg or more, I would be in some sort of mental and emotional panic.
I am about 179 to 181 cm (depending on whether its morning or night) and my weight hovers around 70kg to 70.xxkg. My BMI is thus around 21 to 22.
So when my weight hits 71kg, I would get uptight, sometimes to the point of upset.
I would stare at the mirror after my shower, use my mobile to take pictures of my fatty body. I would also (sort of) get depressed and eat minimally the whole day. For example, a banana for breakfast, an apple for lunch and a simple bun from the nearby bakery for dinner.
If by the next morning my weight doesn't drop back to 70kg, I would continue my "eat minimal strategy" until I hit 70kg the following morning (or repeat next and next and next day until my weight hits around 69 to 70kg).
My new GF thinks I am crazy adopting such a draconian strategy.
I don't think so. I don't want to put on weight and adversely affect my a.fibrilation condition too.
Am I crazy?
Do I really have a Eating Disorder issue?
