http://mollymeek.livejournal.com
On Shit and Prostrating Prostitutes
Posted on 2008.08.12 at 03:00
Prologue: Why they Detest Bloggers
There are those who wish bad things to happen to bloggers. They hope that bloggers will be arrested for vilifying whores, charged for sedition and sued for defamation.
What’s eating them? The easy answer is that bloggers are irresponsible and inflammatory and lack the pro-PAP objectivity essential for mainstream journalism.
The real sin: bloggers are on a different journalistic path from that sanctioned by the state. They demonstrate that it is not necessary to be sycophants when it comes to political commentary.
Agent Chua: Breathe in Shit
Everyone’s perennial favorite partisan political editor Chua Lee Hoong has apparently tickled the fragile nerves of more than one of Molly’s readers. Actually, she’s just doing what she—as well as other worthy mainstream journalists in Singapore—has always done. When Lee Kuan Yew coughs for two seconds, members of the mainstream media will take turns to clear their throats for the following two months. At least. Ridiculous claims become solidified as truths in public discourse. They become indisputable facts, just like the brainlessness inherent in every claim that goes “Singapore is a small island with no natural resources . . .”
“It’s only resource is . . .”
. . .
“. . . social cohesion . . . sensitive . . . conservative . . . racial and religious harmony . . .”
. . .
“. . . NS is necessary . . .”
In short, it’s the amazing feat of making people perceive the shit thrown at them as the air they breathe. Though the less naïve who can see the shit will have a rather hard time inhaling the shit dust.
Shit: A Digression
That reminds me. Let me digress. Shit happens, doesn’t it? Sometimes shit gets spun to you by fans—fans of the living fossils of political mammoths.
But, what to do? It has happened and will continue to happen. Let’s go through the usual routine of examining the stool samples hurled at us for bloody contaminants and diagnose the illnesses of the shitter.
One wonders if shitters have to go through a course in ethical shitting. Perhaps not. After all, some shitters are trained by intelligence departments. Which means that they probably have more experience in digging out shit than in defecating. Why should they care about shitting properly when it doesn’t give them iron rice bowls, and, in fact, shitting in someone’s face could well earn them iron toilet bowls?
By the way, given the logical lapses that some shitters make, do you think it’s possible to shit one’s brains out?
Whore Hub
As Molly thinks she might have suggested, there are lots of devout Lkyists around. So, when Lee Kuan Yew says that there is a “conspiracy to do us in” because the unidentified conspirators “see us as a threat”, the single piece of absurdity will be instinctively spun by the spiders of the SPH into intricate webs. Needless to say, Chua Lee Hoong whose dynasty-building faculties must have been honed to perfection by her ISD experience, has to contribute her insights.
The SPH should give Chua a bonus just for the title of her article alone. It is the existence of journalists like Chua and the sort of articles she contributes that proves to the people that the Straits Times can revamp itself a million times, but it will remain the same in spirit—the sanctioned Singapore Spirit.
“Why they hate Singapore” reflects Chua’s philosophy. If you tell Chua Lee Hoong that you think George Bush is a moronic ass who is oppressing Americans, she will conclude: you hate America.
George Bush = America.
PAP’s undemocratic regime = Singapore.
By that reasoning, Molly should have wished everyone a Happy Undemocratic Governance Day last Saturday. It was otherwise known as National Day.
According to Chua, people hate Singapore—and its good buddy, China—because it is able to progress economically without a proper democracy. And people don’t like it because, apparently, they are stupid enough to think that “liberal values” are necessary for economic progress. There are two facets of progress (economic development and political development) involved, and Chua is defining progress solely in economic terms. In other words, she is assuming that economic progress is the sole purpose of existence. And as long as this objective is met, nothing else matters.
I suppose so. Maybe one day we would attain economic progress by forcing conscripting the entire nation into the National Brothel. Whore Hub. (Nicely alliterative!) If people criticize the government for pimping the whole nation then, we will simply retort by saying that they are jealous that they cannot, too, force their fellow(wo)men into prostitution (or be prostitutes themselves) for the sake of economic progress. They have never run a nation or at least not one like Singapore (since Singapore is unique), so they had better shut up.
Bullshit. No one says that governments have to respect people’s rights and be truly democratic in order to attain economic growth. If anything, governments have to respect people’s rights regardless of economic growth. There are at least two facets of “progress” involved (economic and political), and Chua is treating the economic aspect as everything (except for a passing acknowledgement at the end of her article).
And the jealousy rhetoric is plain silly. Ah Beng criticizes Ah Seng for bribing an errant teacher into giving him the model answers for a test and therefore getting a high score. Ah Beng must be jealous of Ah Seng’s high score. Therefore his criticism of Ah Seng’s dishonesty is invalid.
Aren’t you glad that Chua Lee Hoong became a journalist instead of a teacher?
The irony? Perhaps Ah Beng, too, has a perfect score. Perhaps he has scored even better despite Ah Seng’s cheating. What’s there to be jealous of then? Oh, I guess Ah Beng must be jealous that Ah Seng can do well just by cheating. (Then why the hell doesn’t Ah Beng cheat too?) Where Chua is concerned, it’s probably silly to study for the test and do well when you could cheat and do well. In fact, perhaps Chua would say that cheating is necessary for Ah Seng to do well because Ah Seng is . . . too stupid special. (Well, then perhaps he just doesn’t deserve to do well!)
I’m really thankful that Chua didn’t go from ISD to MOE.
Though I . . . I am not so sure . . . if there are any Chuas amongst the teachers that have taught me. Hmm . . . After all, I think someone told me that schools and the press serve the same function in Singapore.
In any case, since Chua Lee Hoong is really talking about foreigners who “hate Singapore” (i.e. criticize the authoritarianism of the government), may I ask her what about Singaporeans who feel the same way? Are these Singaporeans criticizing authoritarian rule because Singapore has achieved economic progress without real democracy?
Is Molly jealous of her own country’s economic growth??!!
[I suppose Chua will tell me that I’ve been brainwashed by the ideology of liberal Western democracy that insists on being universal. Well, perhaps. However, that sure beats being brainwashed by unpersuasive propaganda generators who insist on particularity and specificity to justify the behavior of their errant masters. In other words, I would rather believe in the terrible liberals than to believe in she who says, “We don’t have to be free because we are special.”
Prostitutes: Another Digression
I probably have to clarify that I have nothing against prostitutes. It is just that I can’t understand why some people would prefer being prostitutes in their own countries to being maids in other people’s countries. But, to each her/her own.
The more important issue is why some people are not content with just being prostitutes. They take to the job so well and do it so keenly that their behavior leaves one bewildered. The phenomenon of the proudly prostrating prostitutes is strange, though some of you might beg to differ and say that they are adopting the missionary position, given that they are actually spreading Someone’s gospel (which means “good news”), but that is a digression within a digression which does not merit further attention.
I have nothing against prostitution. It is simply a different path to lifelong success meant for people who are too special to be given other jobs.
On Shit and Prostrating Prostitutes
Posted on 2008.08.12 at 03:00
Prologue: Why they Detest Bloggers
There are those who wish bad things to happen to bloggers. They hope that bloggers will be arrested for vilifying whores, charged for sedition and sued for defamation.
What’s eating them? The easy answer is that bloggers are irresponsible and inflammatory and lack the pro-PAP objectivity essential for mainstream journalism.
The real sin: bloggers are on a different journalistic path from that sanctioned by the state. They demonstrate that it is not necessary to be sycophants when it comes to political commentary.
Agent Chua: Breathe in Shit
Everyone’s perennial favorite partisan political editor Chua Lee Hoong has apparently tickled the fragile nerves of more than one of Molly’s readers. Actually, she’s just doing what she—as well as other worthy mainstream journalists in Singapore—has always done. When Lee Kuan Yew coughs for two seconds, members of the mainstream media will take turns to clear their throats for the following two months. At least. Ridiculous claims become solidified as truths in public discourse. They become indisputable facts, just like the brainlessness inherent in every claim that goes “Singapore is a small island with no natural resources . . .”
“It’s only resource is . . .”
. . .
“. . . social cohesion . . . sensitive . . . conservative . . . racial and religious harmony . . .”
. . .
“. . . NS is necessary . . .”
In short, it’s the amazing feat of making people perceive the shit thrown at them as the air they breathe. Though the less naïve who can see the shit will have a rather hard time inhaling the shit dust.
Shit: A Digression
That reminds me. Let me digress. Shit happens, doesn’t it? Sometimes shit gets spun to you by fans—fans of the living fossils of political mammoths.
But, what to do? It has happened and will continue to happen. Let’s go through the usual routine of examining the stool samples hurled at us for bloody contaminants and diagnose the illnesses of the shitter.
One wonders if shitters have to go through a course in ethical shitting. Perhaps not. After all, some shitters are trained by intelligence departments. Which means that they probably have more experience in digging out shit than in defecating. Why should they care about shitting properly when it doesn’t give them iron rice bowls, and, in fact, shitting in someone’s face could well earn them iron toilet bowls?
By the way, given the logical lapses that some shitters make, do you think it’s possible to shit one’s brains out?
Whore Hub
As Molly thinks she might have suggested, there are lots of devout Lkyists around. So, when Lee Kuan Yew says that there is a “conspiracy to do us in” because the unidentified conspirators “see us as a threat”, the single piece of absurdity will be instinctively spun by the spiders of the SPH into intricate webs. Needless to say, Chua Lee Hoong whose dynasty-building faculties must have been honed to perfection by her ISD experience, has to contribute her insights.
The SPH should give Chua a bonus just for the title of her article alone. It is the existence of journalists like Chua and the sort of articles she contributes that proves to the people that the Straits Times can revamp itself a million times, but it will remain the same in spirit—the sanctioned Singapore Spirit.
“Why they hate Singapore” reflects Chua’s philosophy. If you tell Chua Lee Hoong that you think George Bush is a moronic ass who is oppressing Americans, she will conclude: you hate America.
George Bush = America.
PAP’s undemocratic regime = Singapore.
By that reasoning, Molly should have wished everyone a Happy Undemocratic Governance Day last Saturday. It was otherwise known as National Day.
According to Chua, people hate Singapore—and its good buddy, China—because it is able to progress economically without a proper democracy. And people don’t like it because, apparently, they are stupid enough to think that “liberal values” are necessary for economic progress. There are two facets of progress (economic development and political development) involved, and Chua is defining progress solely in economic terms. In other words, she is assuming that economic progress is the sole purpose of existence. And as long as this objective is met, nothing else matters.
I suppose so. Maybe one day we would attain economic progress by forcing conscripting the entire nation into the National Brothel. Whore Hub. (Nicely alliterative!) If people criticize the government for pimping the whole nation then, we will simply retort by saying that they are jealous that they cannot, too, force their fellow(wo)men into prostitution (or be prostitutes themselves) for the sake of economic progress. They have never run a nation or at least not one like Singapore (since Singapore is unique), so they had better shut up.
Bullshit. No one says that governments have to respect people’s rights and be truly democratic in order to attain economic growth. If anything, governments have to respect people’s rights regardless of economic growth. There are at least two facets of “progress” involved (economic and political), and Chua is treating the economic aspect as everything (except for a passing acknowledgement at the end of her article).
And the jealousy rhetoric is plain silly. Ah Beng criticizes Ah Seng for bribing an errant teacher into giving him the model answers for a test and therefore getting a high score. Ah Beng must be jealous of Ah Seng’s high score. Therefore his criticism of Ah Seng’s dishonesty is invalid.
Aren’t you glad that Chua Lee Hoong became a journalist instead of a teacher?
The irony? Perhaps Ah Beng, too, has a perfect score. Perhaps he has scored even better despite Ah Seng’s cheating. What’s there to be jealous of then? Oh, I guess Ah Beng must be jealous that Ah Seng can do well just by cheating. (Then why the hell doesn’t Ah Beng cheat too?) Where Chua is concerned, it’s probably silly to study for the test and do well when you could cheat and do well. In fact, perhaps Chua would say that cheating is necessary for Ah Seng to do well because Ah Seng is . . . too stupid special. (Well, then perhaps he just doesn’t deserve to do well!)
I’m really thankful that Chua didn’t go from ISD to MOE.
Though I . . . I am not so sure . . . if there are any Chuas amongst the teachers that have taught me. Hmm . . . After all, I think someone told me that schools and the press serve the same function in Singapore.
In any case, since Chua Lee Hoong is really talking about foreigners who “hate Singapore” (i.e. criticize the authoritarianism of the government), may I ask her what about Singaporeans who feel the same way? Are these Singaporeans criticizing authoritarian rule because Singapore has achieved economic progress without real democracy?
Is Molly jealous of her own country’s economic growth??!!
[I suppose Chua will tell me that I’ve been brainwashed by the ideology of liberal Western democracy that insists on being universal. Well, perhaps. However, that sure beats being brainwashed by unpersuasive propaganda generators who insist on particularity and specificity to justify the behavior of their errant masters. In other words, I would rather believe in the terrible liberals than to believe in she who says, “We don’t have to be free because we are special.”
Prostitutes: Another Digression
I probably have to clarify that I have nothing against prostitutes. It is just that I can’t understand why some people would prefer being prostitutes in their own countries to being maids in other people’s countries. But, to each her/her own.
The more important issue is why some people are not content with just being prostitutes. They take to the job so well and do it so keenly that their behavior leaves one bewildered. The phenomenon of the proudly prostrating prostitutes is strange, though some of you might beg to differ and say that they are adopting the missionary position, given that they are actually spreading Someone’s gospel (which means “good news”), but that is a digression within a digression which does not merit further attention.
I have nothing against prostitution. It is simply a different path to lifelong success meant for people who are too special to be given other jobs.
